It's Everyday with John and Jay
We're the unapologetically raw comedy podcast that’s not afraid to push boundaries. Packed with outrageous skits, off-the-cuff banter, and original songs, John and Jay bring their no-holds-barred humor to everyday topics, wild hypotheticals, and everything in between. Whether you’re here for belly laughs or pure chaos, this is the ultimate shoot-the-shit show for anyone who loves their comedy a little rough around the edges
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It's Everyday with John and Jay
Episode 184: The Birthday Celebration, Burger Reviews, and The Naked Gun
What happens when two friends with no filter hit record and just let the conversation flow? Pure entertainment. In this milestone 184th episode, Jay recounts his recent birthday celebrations that included prime seats at a Toledo Mud Hens game and dining at the quirky Speed Trap Diner in Woodville – complete with its iconic police car mounted on the roof as a playful jab at the town's reputation for catching speeders.
The food discussion takes center stage when John shares his discovery of Beckett's Burger Bar, leading to an unexpected revelation about their proprietary soda that blew both hosts away. "It's like a Pepsi on steroids," John exclaims, revealing how quickly his initial skepticism transformed into genuine enthusiasm. Their detailed breakdown of the restaurant's "tachos" (tater tot nachos) will have your mouth watering and adding this spot to your must-visit list.
Entertainment reviews provide another highlight as John delivers his verdict on the new Naked Gun movie starring Liam Neeson. His enthusiastic endorsement praises how the film honors the original trilogy's comedy style while incorporating subtle modern touches. The hosts then dive into a music session, sampling tracks from metal bands like Psycho Frame and Still Remains, offering their unfiltered reactions and comparisons to other artists in the genre.
The conversation takes interesting turns through relationship standards, dating expectations, and even a brief debate about whether Beyoncé has truly surpassed Michael Jackson's cultural impact (spoiler: they're firmly in the King of Pop's corner). Throughout it all, John and Jay maintain the authentic, conversational style that's kept listeners coming back for nearly four years.
Ready for more unfiltered conversations, random discoveries, and laugh-out-loud moments? Subscribe now and join us next week when John tries Hot Heads Burritos and reports whether it lives up to the hype!
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'Beavis and Butt-head' Cover art created by Joe Crawford
It's everyday with John and Jay Comedy.
Speaker 3:Skits, random bullshit. Tim and Jerry, it's not your day, it's not my day. This is our day, and it's my day. This is our day, and it's every day with John and Jay. You like racy shit, you like problems going on. You like sexual misconduct? You're in the right fucking place. Listen up, you fucking freaks. It is time to get the show on the road. We're ready to hit this episode of it's every day with john and aj.
Speaker 4:Let's rock hey, all you fucking fruitcakes out there. Hey, rudy, no, I'm just kidding. Hey, what's up? We love you so every day welcome to. What episode is this? 185 6 2, 3 uh 184 184. Okay, we made it. I was all around. I would have sucked the prices right on that one dude, but anyway, 184 today. It's awesome, so, great so real quick.
Speaker 5:I want to give a big happy birthday to this guy over here At the time of this recordingay celebrated his birthday between last episode and now.
Speaker 6:Thank you, brother, a lot of applause I wish I had one of them.
Speaker 4:Like you know, like I was telling somebody, I said and I'm pretty sure a lot of people relate like as you get older it just fucking doesn't doesn't.
Speaker 5:Yeah, I don't like it's another day, yeah it it does but I had a great birthday.
Speaker 4:Um went to a mud hens game. Uh, ate at the speed trap that's such a good place.
Speaker 5:I fucking love it.
Speaker 4:If you're in the my sister's never been there, dude. Oh really, yeah, that food's so good there. Oh, did we smash? It was so fucking.
Speaker 5:You're in the northwest Ohio area, specifically in Woodville. Yes, there's a little diner called the Speed Trap Diner and it's fucking awesome. Check it out.
Speaker 4:No joke, it's called the Speed Trap because it makes fun of the police there in Woodville.
Speaker 5:It's a notorious speeding speed trap area, so you don't ever they make fun of it.
Speaker 4:They even have a cop car on the roof. Yeah, so it lights up.
Speaker 5:They take the piss out of it, which I love.
Speaker 4:So it's, it's really and they have an ice cream place right next to it.
Speaker 5:It's connected to it?
Speaker 4:yeah, so you can get, like you can get, your food and dessert what'd you get?
Speaker 5:did you get a burger?
Speaker 4:oh yes, I did yeah dude, they have a.
Speaker 5:They have a big imitation big mac there. That's what I always get. It's so good. That's what I get when I go there. That's awesome.
Speaker 3:Yeah, it's amazing.
Speaker 5:I don't know what it's called, but it's like a. It's a fake big Mac and it's fucking awesome.
Speaker 4:Yeah, I love it, man, um, I, uh, we got there, we ate there, and then we went to, uh, went to the mud hens game cause my company paid for it. Nice, um, and then, uh, dude, just spent a shit ton of money. But, dude, I'll show you some of the pictures I got, because steve brooke steve's wife uh, she, she's on one of those like wheelie cart things, dude, so she couldn't go down where we were. Okay, so this is the view from steve where he was standing okay dude, it's just beautiful, it's a perfect night it wass.
Speaker 5:There isn't a bad seat in that place either. This is where we were dude. Holy shit, you guys were like right there. Yeah, damn bro, yeah, you guys were like right up there.
Speaker 4:So it was funny, because Kristen's cup holder was busted off so she stuck her fork in it, like it was just like fit a fork in there or a spoon or something dude. But yeah, just like fit a fork in there or a spoon or something dude. Yeah, but yeah, it was amazing. It was a lot of fun. What was crazy is that my plant manager, the head honcho where I work, was sitting in the same row we are and I was so drunk I was worried about going up the stairs Back up dude, you know, but it was so much fun, it was just a blast, it was a lot of fun.
Speaker 4:And then, uh, saturday, I dj'd the corvette car show over in finley, ohio. So it's about 20, 20 miles away from us and uh, downtown main street in finley.
Speaker 4:Next year I'm putting my mustang in it okay um, but uh, ran thousand feet of fucking speaker wire at least and dude it was. It turned out great. A huge shout out to sarah, that works for me. And then, um, that worked for me at a level up, and then also, uh, chloe, that works for me in the dj service, because they both those girls rocked her ass off. Dude, poor Sarah. Looked like a lobster dude. She was in the sun. Um, what the fuck did I do that night? I can't remember. Sarah wanted to take me out to dinner, so we went to hotheads and then Sarah was like, hey, you want to go get something to eat or whatever, and so I ended up going to. We went back to finley and we ate at a place called flight deck or something like that, or flight I think I've heard of this place.
Speaker 5:Yeah, I think I know what you're talking about um, it's, uh, the flight house.
Speaker 4:Oh, it's called the light house and it's Flight House and it's in Findlay and it's on Bright Road. Oh, okay, it's definitely a different style of eating and place, because it was just Okay, it was really. It was like their menu was on the table. You had to scan it, order your food there.
Speaker 4:Okay, it was cool because you could actually order right from there. They bring your shit out and then you pay from there too, like on your phone interesting. So it's all done there. But the food was kind of basic. It wasn't like anything super spectacular, like I had their brisket sandwich and it was like little pieces of cube brisket. It was like it tastes like roast beef. It didn't taste very good, but it wasn't bad. It wasn't a bad place to eat. Um sunday I went to the tackle box too I saw that.
Speaker 5:I saw fremont, your, your, uh, your daughter didn't want nothing to do with those videos oh, dude, she hates it.
Speaker 4:I know it's so funny.
Speaker 5:I know well as a dad, it's your job to embarrass them. That's what you live. I mean, that's the whole point.
Speaker 4:So went to the tackle box too. Food, amazing dude the place was packed. Where's?
Speaker 6:tackle box one at.
Speaker 4:I think it's in more like Parkland Oak.
Speaker 6:Harbor place.
Speaker 7:But it's right on the river which is really cool, and they got a deck that you can look on.
Speaker 4:Oh that's sweet so you can look at the muddy Sandusky. Yay, looks like the chocolate river from fucking.
Speaker 6:Don't say something later.
Speaker 5:I'm so hungry. You know where I ate. I remember you telling me about this place. If Finley, speaking of which Beckett's Burger Bar, what'd you think Fucking loved it? Yes, amazing. Did you get the tacho? I got the tacho. How would you think? Fucking amazing? I know, dude. I was like dude because me and carrie went, and I was like dude let's try this becca's jake because I remember, because we were trying to find somewhere to eat because carrie didn't want to do. The same old same.
Speaker 4:It's all the way on the other side. I know well?
Speaker 5:carrie's like, well, let's do something different because I'm tired of the same old shit. And I'm like, okay, I go, you want to go to Finley? She's like, yeah, but she goes, I don't want to do, let's do something different. And I'm like, okay, I go, oh, oh, I go, let's do Beckett's Burger Bar. She's like, what's that to go there? She's like, yeah, sure, so we went there and I.
Speaker 4:It's a plus all the way, so yeah I told you, dude.
Speaker 5:So I we were looking for an appetizer and that reminded me. I saw the tachos. I'm like, oh, jay says these are really good. So me and carrie got the tachos. Dude, I, I could have just ate those and I would have been fine. I was so full. I got me the Pub Burger. It had just like the sauce on it and it had like grilled onions and bacon and of course I put all the toppings on it. I know you're not about the tomato and stuff like that, but it was. And Kerry got the bourbon and I took a bite of that and that was fucking awesome.
Speaker 4:I had like grilled onions and grilled tomatoes and like this, uh, bourbon sauce on it fucking good I usually get their chicken bowls, like the ones that have, like I had to get a burger, I mean huge.
Speaker 5:Yeah, I had to get a burger because, like, if you're gonna call yourself burger bar, I I have to try. I was gonna get like next time I may get like a chicken thing just to see what that's like, but if you're calling yourself burger bar, I have to see if your burgers are any fucking good, and I gotta say they were. They were pretty. So here's the thing that surprised me the most of this place and it it I balked a little. By the way, our server was fantastic. She was really good. The service was. I've never had bad services. The service was little. By the way, our server was fantastic. She was really good. The service was.
Speaker 4:I've never had bad service.
Speaker 5:The service was aces, by the way. So we got there and she's like hey, welcome to Beckett's. My name's so-and-so, I'll take care of you. She goes would you guys want something to start a drink? I go Coke, pepsi. She goes actually, we have our own proprietary soda. Like what are you talking about? She's like well, beckett's has their own soda. We don't have Coke or Pepsi, so we have like this and this and this. And then she goes we have like a zero calorie version. I'm like okay. Carrie's like what the fuck? I'm like Carrie's like well, I'll just have the regular cola. I go yeah, I'll take the diet version. She goes okay, yep, she goes uh, it's actually really good. It's made with all natural ingredients cane sugar. There's no, uh, artificial preservatives. There's no, uh, high fructose corn syrup. It's all, it's all natural. I'm like, fuck it, I go give me the diet version. She'll have the regular. She's like okay, let me tell you this, dude the best tasting fucking soda I've ever had in my life that's awesome, dude.
Speaker 4:I'm so glad you love that. I never know with you I I was. I usually have one of those in bg. That's where I first ate it. Okay, yeah, and I found out finley had one. I'm like are you fucking kidding me?
Speaker 5:carrie took a drink. She's like holy shit, and I go, let me try. I'm like, are you fucking kidding me? Carrie took a drink. She's like holy shit, and I go, let me try yours. I'm like it tasted like a better Pepsi, like a Pepsi on steroids, and I'm just like I can't get enough of this. I go do they sell this in stores. See to me when they say, oh, we make our own. I figure they got. They're making it in the back out of fucking mop water or something they're churning and shit.
Speaker 6:They're churning it like.
Speaker 5:Come on, we got a diet out there.
Speaker 8:Come on.
Speaker 5:We gotta get a diet out there, and they're brewing it Like come on.
Speaker 4:Hurry, there's Amish people back there making their shit. Put some more fucking onion petals in there or something. Mr Beckett's back there stomping grapes.
Speaker 5:That's what I thought of. It's like what do you mean? They have their own soda, it's.
Speaker 5:That's the weirdest I've never heard of that either. I go, I go. I told terry, but with the waitress left to go get it, I go. What kind of place does it have coke or pepsi? That's the stupidest fucking thing. And I'm like, okay, we're off to a bad start already. So I'm like they don't have coke or pepsi, as carrie's like, yeah, I don't know what that's about. So she goes all right here, you guys go. You guys I go. Well, we want the tacho. She goes oh, that's a good choice, because I love those blah, blah, blah. I'm like, okay, I took a drink. I'm like it's like one of those, like like one of those eye popping moments, like it just opens your brain up and you're just like like a piece of lightning.
Speaker 4:Yeah, it's like your penis. It hits right to my penis.
Speaker 5:So to say, I go me, and Carrie went as far as to actually look up if they sell it in stores. Apparently they do, so Carrie's like let's get some.
Speaker 5:I'm like yes, so that's what it went from, like it was just a tale of two emotions going from oh, what the fuck Did you find them? No, we didn't go look. Yet Carrie looked. Going from oh, what the did you find them? No, we didn't go look yet. Uh, carrie looked up where apparently they sell, but like kroger and other, like specialty stores around ohio, and stuff.
Speaker 5:So yeah, I don't, maybe they could, so we, we. It was like the. It was like two separate emotions all within a span of three minutes. It's just like like oh, what the fuck they have their own. Then it's like whoa, holy, holy shit, you know one of those things? But yeah, beckett's burger bar fucking, aces, dude, fucking amazing.
Speaker 3:I'm so glad you loved it, man.
Speaker 5:The tachos were amazing too, and they were like they were deep, like they were. You could tell they were like they weren't baked. They were deep fried, so like they absorbed more of the flavor and all the fucking awesome nacho shit. God, I love those. I could go for some right now.
Speaker 4:No joke like, and then like I've. I went to madison street and they tried to like. I think they had tachos too, and I'm like I tried them and I was like no, this is not. No, you can't replicate beckett's tachos, it just is yeah I I yeah.
Speaker 5:Good call on the beckett's tachos. It just yeah. I I yeah. Good call on the beckett's burger bar and carrie's like okay, we need to come back here, I'm like yes we do, because all we ever go we go to like two places and carrie's been wanting to like expand her horizons or something so by the time this airs, this will be monday next monday yeah tomorrow, john and I are going to hit up the Hot Heads Burritos because I told him he's not a Chipotle fan.
Speaker 5:I hate Chipotle and I realize that I am very much alone in that. No, there's a lot of people that don't.
Speaker 4:I don't know, man that's one thing my mom agrees with you on I love your mom. So you know, it's not a left or right thing, it's a Chipotle thing, it's a Chipotle thing, it's a.
Speaker 5:Chipotle thing. Republicans and Democrats can all agree that Chipotle is underdog shit.
Speaker 4:But dude, hothead burritos makes Chipotle taste like dog food.
Speaker 5:I am very curious about those hothead burritos. Oh my God, I've heard good things.
Speaker 4:Sarah wanted to go there for our anniversary. She's like okay.
Speaker 4:I said, babe said where do you want to go? Because the 28th was our anniversary. I said, where do you want to go? Happy anniversary, thank you. I said, where do you want to go for our anniversary? And I'm thinking olive garden. I'm like, fuck, I'm gonna have to drop a benjamin on this shit, you know. And people like benjamin, what are you buying there? I said, dude, we get the take-home meals and then also we buy, uh, we get, you know, like sometimes we get dessert, you know, because it's our anniversary, and then also we get the fried lasagna. It's so fucking good. So she goes. I want to go to Hot Ed Burritos. I'm like, fuck, yeah, dude, let's go. So rather than spending $100, I spent maybe $15, $20. Okay, because it's not that expensive either, dude.
Speaker 5:Carrie's been there and she says she really likes it.
Speaker 7:Dude it's so fucking good.
Speaker 5:I've always wanted to try it because Carrie sings its praises a lot.
Speaker 4:So next Tuesday, before we have our podcast, John's going to have had the hot burrito. And I will report back and we'll see when it comes to burgers, I know a good burger and I. That's where I point John at, because, like I, got him into the son of Thurman's yeah, that place is good too fucking uh into the speed trap that place is good too, yeah and then into Beckett's burger bar you, you're, you're always, uh, your, your breast rat recommendations are usually top much fucking titty having fat man dude yeah
Speaker 4:you know, I told a dude today. I said you know what I? I said that's the reason why I was a fat kid is because I was impatient with my body. I couldn't wait for my tits to grow in. And he stood there and looked at me for a second. He goes what he busts out laughing. He goes dude, I never know what you're gonna say. Yeah, that's dude. Yeah, that's what he said at work keep you on your toes like there's a post.
Speaker 4:they're like behind our desk I work, there's a post and, like the, the desk is like maybe like from right here to the to here's the post and you can stand there and you can push off the desk and push your back against it and it'll fucking crack your back. And I was doing it. I said, man, this post is perfect for back crack. And I said I wonder if I turn around, if it'll help me with anything else. So I turned around and put my hands on the desk and stuck my dick against the post.
Speaker 5:So come, so come on helmet head. Uh, in other news, I downloaded and watched the new naked gun movie. Oh, I didn't get to fucking see it yet. No spoiler, I won't give spoilers that well. I will give just a quick review yeah, please.
Speaker 4:I want to know whether it was good or was it bad.
Speaker 5:It was awesome. Was it as good as it was Fucking? Yes, it was just like the old movies. I give it a plus.
Speaker 4:How was Liam Neeson's comedic time? Good, really good he plays that role so well, I just want to borrow whatever you watched it on and just fucking watch it.
Speaker 5:Oh my God, man, that might be one I'll spend 20 on it's interesting, going from, like abby gilmore 2, which was okay, pretty mediocre, to naked gun, which was phenomenal. I give it a solid, a, b plus a minus. The jokes were hidden. It was lot, it was a. It was just like the old movies. There was always there was something going on in every scene. It was one of those naked gun movies where, like you're, you're catching shit all over the place. It's like this is just like the old movies. I was like I was super satisfied.
Speaker 4:That's kind of surprised that mel brooks didn't make those right, because it just seems right up, right up his alley.
Speaker 5:Uh, seth mc, you could tell there was a couple scenes I won't say you know, because jay hasn't seen this yet, so I won't give spoilers. There was a scene where I could tell seth mcfarland had his fucking bits all over. It was still really, really funny, but it was it. I could tell it's like okay, I could tell who influenced this scene, but I still loved it. It was. I could tell I was like okay, I could tell who influenced this scene, but I still loved it. The majority of the movie was it had that classic Naked Gun Crime Noir feel to it.
Speaker 4:See and that's why I like Seth MacFarlane is because you knew he was going to keep it like that.
Speaker 5:Yeah, he gets it, he gets it and it's like okay, please, if we get Spaceballs the same as this, it's gonna be so good, because I hope mel brooks can deliver that, but this delivered in spades, I want to go see it actually in theaters, to be honest with you, because that's how much I love this movie. So, and as far as like, like it's just, it was just just. It was like my head. I came out of that theater. I know when a comedy is good when I come out of a theater and I got a headache from laughing so hard, cause there was at least three times where I was just like ah, you know I was. I was just like losing my shit. So it definitely check it out. It was fucking good.
Speaker 4:I want to see what they got going on. Star view Star View Tiffin.
Speaker 5:Pamela Anderson was the leading lady, and she didn't do bad. There was a part in this movie that got me laughing really hard.
Speaker 4:The Naked Gun is in Tiffin's theater yeah.
Speaker 5:Yeah, I think so is it. Yeah, it is. Yeah, there was Pam, uh, pamel Anderson. I guess Liam Neeson and Pamel Anderson are dating. Did you know that? What? Yeah, they're dating In real life In real life.
Speaker 4:That's fucking weird.
Speaker 5:I just I found that out when I was okay, because I'm cynical to the point where, like I, to the point where, like I will go see a movie and I will have my opinions. But then I'll go to like popular, like movie critic people on youtube and see if their opinions align with mine. It doesn't change my opinion, but I want to see their thoughts on the movie and see if, like they're, if they feel the same way that I do. Like I said, it's not like their opinions change mine, but I always like to see people who are really highly critical of movies how they see it. For the most part, everybody I've seen said they love it. This is actually like if this is the return of the spoof genre, hopefully this will be it right here, and then Spaceballs could kind of continue that momentum. So we'll see. Yeah, they're coming out with a. They're coming out with a. Speaking of that spoof, they're coming out with another spinal tap. Oh, dude, I never watched you ever see the original.
Speaker 5:You have to be kind of into that kind of like mockumentary. You know, like uh bested show you know you ever seen best in show. It was written by ug levy and it had. It was kind of like mockumentary. You know, like uh bested show you know you ever seen best in show. It was written by ug levy and it had. It was kind of like the precursor to schitt's creek. Not like it for real, but it's like it had all a lot of the. So it had, um, the mom from home alone, whatever her name is. Uh, she was in this movie. Rachel mAdams, rachel McAdams, you want to see the McDonald's movie?
Speaker 6:There's no McDonald's movie.
Speaker 5:That's a classic Tim and Jerry skit. You guys can check that out. One of our old episodes.
Speaker 4:I don't know which one. Wasn't the name like Barbara something, or O'Hara or something? Oh yeah, catherine, o'hara, catherine.
Speaker 5:O'Hara, so, like they. Ug Levy wrote this movie, I believe, and it's. It's basically just follows these several people and they go to like a the Westminster dog show and uh oh, who's the? Who's the butch haired lady from 40 year old virgin. She's one of the main characters.
Speaker 4:Jane Lynch.
Speaker 5:Jane Lynch was one of the main characters. She's like the returning grand champion, so it follows like her story with her. But they it's a mockumentary, it's told in a mock.
Speaker 4:She was in another movie too, like an old movie. Oh really, was she in fucking big with Tom Hanks? I think she was. I think Jane Lynch was one of his, one of the the boss's workers, or was she in like Christmas vacation? I don't know. No, she was in one of those old movies, dude okay let me see, here I'm looking, I'm looking the rocker. I knew she was in that.
Speaker 5:Let's look up her wiki, her wiki, wiki wiki wiki wiki wiki wiki wiki wiki wiki wiki, wiki, wiki wiki wiki wiki wiki wiki wiki wiki wiki wiki wiki wiki wiki wiki wiki wiki wiki wiki wiki wiki wiki wiki wiki wiki wiki wiki wiki wiki wiki wiki wiki wiki wiki wiki wiki wiki wiki wiki wiki wiki wiki wiki, wiki, wiki wiki wiki, wiki, wiki.
Speaker 4:W no one's will know what the vice versa vice versa she was in vice versa as miss lindstrom. She was one of the his bosses lackeys okay yeah, I remember her being in it. Um, let me hear a little. See if I can pull up a little picture of her are you still a virgin?
Speaker 5:no, no right there shit, dude, she looks exactly the same, almost the hair is kind of poofy, but yeah, jesus strickland, did he ever have hair?
Speaker 4:dude, I miss those dude, I fucking what I say and shit. Oh my god that was a really fun waste of a summer, I should say oh, by the way, by the time you read this, or listen to this not read this, god damn it by the time you listen to this, level up and tippin will be open again. Just letting you know that little drop ski on that one, yeah, a little uh, so.
Speaker 5:So he got all his shit taken care of, huh not all of it.
Speaker 4:Not all of it enough to get open really yeah so what?
Speaker 5:what do you think the future holds there?
Speaker 4:depends on what he does, depends on if he's I mean, is he?
Speaker 5:gonna? Is he gonna continue on the circle of suck there, or is he actually to see the error of his ways and try to do what's right? Or am I just waxing intellectuals at this point?
Speaker 4:Come on, little children. I was reading that on there, dude, that's what made me laugh. But no, come, little children, you can look at dirty pictures.
Speaker 5:That's horrible. We should save that one for Halloween, though.
Speaker 4:What was I thinking today? I was like pumpkins or something like that. Oh man, I was like Spooky, spooky skeletons. I was like something about.
Speaker 5:I'm actually ready for fall. To be quite honest with you.
Speaker 4:Pumpkins and kisses or something like that.
Speaker 5:Football starts really soon, actually Sooner than we think. High school football starts in two weeks. That's wild, that's wild. And then Ohio State is like two weeks after that, I believe Number one versus number two. Ohio State, Texas one versus two. Which one's one? Texas Texas is number one In the coaches poll. Yep, Ohio State's number two.
Speaker 4:That's going to watch somebody drop. That's going to be the first drop right there.
Speaker 5:Ohio State's athletic director is kind of changing things up a little bit for the game day atmosphere. I don't know. The one thing that stuck out to me is they're going to ring the victory bell before the game to like kind of like hype things up. You know how the browns do the fucking guitar with the speaker thing. You know what I'm talking about. Where they have a celebrity come who has ties to the browns or ohio, they take a guitar with the team, like the team they're playing against and they smash it or whatever, but I think it's fucking hokey.
Speaker 5:Why don't they have them fucking play it? I think it's hokey as fuck, but whatever. So Ohio State's going to do something kind of similar to that, where they're going to have either someone who's close to the football team or a legend or blah blah, blah blah ring the victory bell before the game as like a way to hype the crowd.
Speaker 4:I fucking hate that you know what I think the browns should do? Here's an idea.
Speaker 5:When that's a good, that's the first, that's the first thing you know what you do?
Speaker 4:get a little like dog toy stuffed football player, okay of the opposite team, and have a fucking real dog. Tear the shit out of it I mean, it's better than just that's what you do it's better than just oh, look at little rufus, go ham on that stealer, guy I think it's all stupid as fuck.
Speaker 5:I just think it's hokey.
Speaker 4:I just I don't, it's just tonight at unzip. Fly dicks out night it's just like I.
Speaker 5:I don't want to see a celebrity or someone just awkwardly trying to smash a guitar over a big speaker. It's just and honestly. I'm not a big fan of. I don't mind subtle changes to tradition, but like the victory bell is, when you fucking win, you ring it. When you win, you don't ring it before you play.
Speaker 4:I only like the guitar thing. If it sounds like El Caban, you get that boom sound effect. Dude, can you find that?
Speaker 8:like El Caban boom.
Speaker 4:Caban B-O-N-G Like oh, come on Bing.
Speaker 9:Come on, B-O-N-G, Stick him up train.
Speaker 8:Come on, ole, stick him up stagecoach. Come on, ole, stick him up stagecoach. Kaboom, ha, ha, ha, ha ha. Hole Stick him up banker. Kaboom, hole, Stick him up. Please Smoke if you wish, kaboom Hole.
Speaker 9:The kabooms are thick as flies around here. Who's gonna hit him?
Speaker 4:Kaboom. Ha ha, ha, ha ha, I forgot what his name was baba louie.
Speaker 5:I forgot, it was baba louie but dude actually. So baba louie here. This is. This is cultural misappropriation, right here here.
Speaker 6:This is, this is cultural misappropriation, right here shut the fuck up.
Speaker 4:Not everything has to have a fucking thing behind it, but uh, but what we are gonna do is we're gonna take a little break. Let's take a little break right now. We're gonna take a little break. I got some music to check out dude music time you know we're always gonna check the music out.
Speaker 5:You know that's just a staple of what we do. So we're gonna you're gonna listen to a uh, a disney classic from toy story and we'll be right back you put your friend in me.
Speaker 2:You put your friend in me, close my eyes and open my thighs and you tried to give me a nice, warm surprise. You don't remember what I fucking said, cause you put your friend in me.
Speaker 2:Yeah, you put your friend in me. You put your friend in me. You put your friend in me. No protection and no need to fear Because you've had two or three more beers. You stood together like a butt cheek. Because you put your friend in me. You put your friend in me. Then, when you get to bed, you understand that there's cream in your head. You ask me when I come outside If we can go for a dark night bike ride and as the years go by, I hope the semen dies. You're gonna see, it's our destiny. You got a friend in me. You put your friend in me. You put your friend in me. You put your friend in me. I hope your pull-out game's a lot better.
Speaker 3:Yo, what's up? Welcome back to the Best Freakin' Podcast. It's our day with Johnny J. Baby, listen, you don't keep listening. I'm coming over to your house to lick in your wife's asshole. Stick my tongue up on the dirt button. You got that motherfucker. Now check it out.
Speaker 2:Yo, yo yo.
Speaker 5:I hope you like that it buddy I have good genes, literally and figuratively.
Speaker 4:So anyway, first band.
Speaker 5:All right, here we go, it's called psycho frame.
Speaker 4:Interesting, yes, psycho frame f-r-a-m-e I can't spell for shit there, it is that first one. That's the one that I saw oh, those tones are deep.
Speaker 6:Oh, they're a Christian band. Oh, oh, christian band. Stanky, I like that dual screamer dude. Yeah, that's sweet. It's a good dynamic range.
Speaker 4:They're good Christian boys oh.
Speaker 6:That's meaty, that's dinty.
Speaker 9:More beef stew. I love that shit Is oh my god, yes, I'm so hard Breakdown here, oh God.
Speaker 6:Oh my God, yes, I'm so hard.
Speaker 5:Oh, my God.
Speaker 6:Oh, my God, oh God, oh God.
Speaker 9:Ultimate violence, eternal agony, beliefs, control of the humanity. Open up and Pull it all away. You won't survive. The old one.
Speaker 8:How bad can I Choose another one? Ah, ah.
Speaker 4:Yes, yeah, I love that shit and you can only do that high. No, you can't do it low. Well, you can, but it doesn't sound as good oh, dude, that's going on playlist. Dude, that's a good one, all right next one's called, still remains I've heard of these people and the song of the I was hearing was of love and lunacy oh my god, I've heard.
Speaker 5:I've heard of these dudes. I've heard of all the remains oh dude, I had this fucking album, did you really? Yes, I did. It's a song called out. I know the album's called of love. Yeah.
Speaker 4:The song is called of. You can play whatever you want, dude, I don't care. This is what the. The video is right there. The worst is yet to come up above right there in the middle, the worst is yet to come.
Speaker 2:It's the morning of God.
Speaker 6:God, this is invoking so many memories here. This is early 2000s metalcore right here.
Speaker 9:So good, this is early 2000s metalcore right here so good, I had this album, dude.
Speaker 4:I loved it.
Speaker 5:Oh my god, here we go.
Speaker 3:I love that shit.
Speaker 6:It reminds me of All that Remains. I was just about to bring those guys up.
Speaker 4:This is like the sequel to All that Remains, that's what I say.
Speaker 5:Sometimes I get these guys and All that Remains sometimes mixed up. Do we listen to Tormentous? No, I don't think so.
Speaker 4:Okay, good, that must be another one.
Speaker 5:I took down Tormentus for the rest of us the best of us.
Speaker 4:For the rest of us, it should be a video, hopefully. What? Song oh uh, false, I know, let's see here, keep going oh, he's got the I love you hand gesture.
Speaker 5:Oh, that's so cute, the old sign language.
Speaker 4:That's really sweet. That's so sweet. What about that top one? Is that it?
Speaker 5:What are we looking for?
Speaker 4:No, down below, Down, below, right there the top one, right there this one, yeah.
Speaker 6:Looks like a video.
Speaker 8:Holy shit.
Speaker 4:Okay, look up, tremendous.
Speaker 5:Bleed. I did see that, I did see that, I did see that.
Speaker 4:See if there's a video of it.
Speaker 5:There's Bleed full song.
Speaker 4:Try to go Bleed off video. There should be a full video.
Speaker 5:I remember those guys.
Speaker 1:You don't have them. There's a visualizer video. That's all they got, okay.
Speaker 5:Okay.
Speaker 6:Okay, okay, okay, okay, okay Okay.
Speaker 8:Okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay Okay. Holy shit, dude.
Speaker 4:How is this song not just like 30 seconds long? Dude's going for two minutes. Two minutes, bro. This dude's got to work out, yeah.
Speaker 6:I could never do this in a million years.
Speaker 4:What the fuck is that? What's Gore? Girls of Gojira Street. What the fuck is that dude? What's Gore?
Speaker 9:Girls of Gojira Street. What the fuck is that dude? Slit it wide, baby she's not your toy. She's your execution, james Rattle, hey, scream a wet slice.
Speaker 4:It's got a very Motley Crue-ish feel to it.
Speaker 5:Yeah, that's very Mot like yeah, Motley Crue-ish, but that title would have got my attention for sure.
Speaker 4:Trying to see if there's any here. I'm going to click on this and then just go scroll. Let's roll Me to my meat as I prepare for my fifth crank of the day. Oh, dude, I got to show you something, dude. Oh my God, this is hilarious. Okay, dude, I gotta show you something, dude. Oh my god, this is hilarious. Okay, so I was dying. I sent this to Sarah. Okay, so I'm gonna turn my fucking volume back up.
Speaker 7:Humans can only hold their breath for ten minutes. Then how was Louis Armstrong able to become the first man on the moon?
Speaker 8:That's us. I am in space. I'm on the moon help. I'm on the moon, help, dude.
Speaker 4:I fucking died, dude yeah, it's so funny, dude. Okay, so I'll show you what I sent Steve. Another one dude, I want to see it. Oh, david Bowie's Barbecue Barbecue. Yes, I love shit like that man. Oh, dude, it's so funny. What did I say? Oh, yeah, sent that fucking same Louis Armstrong. Help, if humans can only hold their breath for 10 minutes, how did Louis Armstrong go to the moon?
Speaker 5:dude, that's funny. She killed it, she was, she serious she has to be.
Speaker 4:Oh, by the way yo that? Um, what is it that one song we listened to last week I I played the. Uh, I played her podcast in the truck last night when we were heading to. Uh, okay, to get something to eat yeah and um sarah said that the one you thought was kind of like she. There's no way she's serious that porn fucking one yeah yeah, she was serious dude, dude, I've okay.
Speaker 5:So we listened to her last week. Yeah, I see her everywhere now she's so fucking hot she's everywhere. Now she's a smoke show she she make love like it's 1965, but she tries like so I've seen other like clips of her stuff and she tries way too hard to be like black, you know like oh, I know a lot of ladies like that. I know, but it's like, but it's, it's, it's just like, it's like you can never trust a woman who uses the n-word.
Speaker 4:I'm gonna tell you, there's so many women out there. They're just like oh man, you know all these niggas be crazy. They're so mean man, I need me a good nigga or something like that. I'm like what do?
Speaker 5:you want. So I ever see those like you ever see those like? All the street all the street interviews where like people go around and they ask questions and stuff. Yeah.
Speaker 5:And it's always like he goes. Oh, it's like oh, would you date a guy who's shorter than you? Yada, yada, yada. She's like so, this guy's like so, what's like the minimum amount of money you would date a guy? And she goes he's got to make that bag, motherfucker. He, I ain't gonna take off, no more. She's like full on, what was it? Whoa vicky, there's a little like full-on white girl and she's like I would never marry man or go out with man who don't make at least six fucking figures. Man, you gotta give me the bag, you gotta take care of me, my blah, blah. The guy goes. Why do you talk like that, I wonder?
Speaker 4:if you, you can find it Dude.
Speaker 5:I don't know. He's like why do you talk that way? She's like fuck you, man. He's like you don't wonder why dudes don't want to date you? Because you ate nothing. You don't bring nothing to the table. So it's like one of those like that podcast that always calls women out on their bullshit. Oh yeah.
Speaker 4:Whatever podcast. Whatever podcast, whatever podcast Dude you ever heard of? The Fugazi I think. So Check out the Fugazi podcast. I love this guy. Yeah, it's F? U it's, I think it's two E's there. It is no Fugazi, that's it. You don't qualify Dude. Hit, hit the Cooley triggers a whole panel of single moms. All this, do you hit that one? What that one right there? Yeah, Angel and oh, I've heard these guys.
Speaker 10:As a single mother. Do you believe in, do you believe you deserve a man in the top percentile? And if so, why? And if so, why would that man want you? So, all of y'all single moms besides one. So show of hands. Do you think you deserve a man in the top percentile? Now let me tell you what the top percentile is. The top percentile is.
Speaker 7:Let's go with height just six foot.
Speaker 10:If you want a man that's six foot or above, that's only about 15% of the population. Holy shit, really. Even less than that. If you want a man to make 100K minimum, that's about 10%.
Speaker 7:You looked it up recently, okay. So yeah, it's 10% of the population.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 10:So, with that being said, kids are no kids. Well, that's the thing. If the men have kids.
Speaker 7:Okay, so I didn't understand the question.
Speaker 10:Well, well, if the man has kids or if he doesn't have kids, regardless of that, only 10% of men make you know a hundred K. Yeah, so that's what it is.
Speaker 6:So, what's that?
Speaker 5:combined with the six foot.
Speaker 10:Now. Now since you know what the percentile is? Just based off of height, because that's what's important to, yeah, and based off of income, because that's what's really important. I still don't get that. It's weird.
Speaker 5:So, as a single mother, if you want a guy that's in the top percentile.
Speaker 10:Do you think you deserve? Do you think you deserve that man? So show hands. Do you think you deserve a man in the top percentile? Show hands. We got one None. We got one, none. We got two. Three, we got four Okay. Four, oh, we got five Okay, and you're the only one. So you're the only one. I said that you don't think you do. I'm going to get to you last. Okay For the ladies that now the question is I love this. It's close, babe, for that man.
Speaker 10:Gotcha bitch, you bitch, deserve a man in the top percentile, and if so, why would that man want you? Okay, let's start here. So you think you deserve him. Why would that man want you?
Speaker 7:Well, for one, because I'm a very good mother. I'm not a perfect mom, but I'm a very good mom.
Speaker 10:But what does that have to do with him?
Speaker 7:Because I think that shows a lot about my character.
Speaker 10:And mom. So I think, but what does that have to do with him? Because I think that shows a lot about my character. Um, and why do I think I deserve it? Because I believe that wait, wait, time out, that doesn't show that. So if you are a single mother, you being a good mother, that doesn't show that you, you have good character. Because single mothers normally don't have good character, generally speaking, because they chose the wrong meaning, that they normally broke up their relationship, they initiated the breakup. So they show single moms show the worst characteristic traits. To be honest, I'll tell you, I'll explain why.
Speaker 10:Because if they had good characteristics they would be with the baby father. They would have chose a man that's worthy of them to have a good kid with, and they would stay with that man. Furthermore, they would see that, okay, if I leave this man, then my daughter or my son would be without a father, and we know that a child without a father leads to more degeneracy.
Speaker 7:My 22 year old self would kick myself in the face forever, like picking the man that I chose to have a child with.
Speaker 10:Okay, so I just wanted to let you know that when we see a single mom.
Speaker 4:We don't see good character, even if she can claim that she's a good mom. We see terrible mom.
Speaker 7:That's a single mom. I can't wait to answer this, and I I do agree with that to a point that's dude, he's, he's do all these.
Speaker 5:Do you just look at their faces, man? Look at these women's faces.
Speaker 4:They're like, oh hell, no well, dude, they have a misconception of reality.
Speaker 5:You know, like I talked about this last week, it's like women want to date men over six feet or six foot or taller, and it's like, well, and I've seen, I see this everywhere where. So it's like so, if you prefer a man over six foot where he doesn't control his height, he has no control over that. Uh, is it okay for a man to judge a woman based on weight?
Speaker 4:and a lot of them say no why I watch a dude say, hey, um, like a dude carrying a scale, he's like all right, step on the scale yeah, I see that, I see that everywhere.
Speaker 5:Yeah, so it's. It's just like. I mean, people have preferences, I get that and it's like, but you can't.
Speaker 4:So you're gonna say that a height is a preference, but a weight isn't it?
Speaker 5:they're both preferences, see, and that's where the problem is. That's the problem. Wise, yeah, hypocrisy, yeah, exactly that's what a lot of they expose a lot of, and I'm telling you what, dude, I fuck me a fat chick.
Speaker 5:You know I've never fucked a 10, but I will fuck five twos if I have to. That's a George Carlin joke. I got that from George Carlin. I can't. That is amazing, he goes. You know I've never fucked a 10, but one night I fucked five twos. George Carlin, it was a George Carlin joke. I was night, I fucked five twos. Ah, george carlin, it was a george carlin joke. I was like dude, that dude's a legend.
Speaker 4:God damn, I wish you, dude, I wish you were still around today. Sarah asked me all the time she's like if I was huge, like my 600 pound life, would you still be with me? Yeah, yeah no I'm fucking dude. I'd put some ketchup on the hot dog. Let your fucking suck that shit right off.
Speaker 2:I know you hungry. Hey fellas, I'm ready to fuck.
Speaker 5:Oh my gosh, you want me on top.
Speaker 6:No, I'll be on top.
Speaker 5:You better make me cum or I'm going to kick your butt.
Speaker 6:Fetch me lover, fetch me there, fetch me there.
Speaker 5:It's my favorite part of that whole movie Dude. It gets me busted out every time. Why do they call her t-rex? Hey brothers, I'm ready to fuck. It's fucking, it's, it's his voice. I think that's what makes it so you can't stop me.
Speaker 4:Orgasmo, orgasmo. Ron jeremy sexual allegations ron jeremy sexual allegations.
Speaker 5:Oh yeah, yeah, I remember him being in and uh, he was at a music. Uh, all that rebate, not all that rates. Oh, a day a day to remember. He was at a day to remember music video. I remember they're he was teaching a class how to like hardcore dance. It's so weird. Hold on, let me, I'll look that up real quick.
Speaker 4:Oh fucking it's so I slap and motherfucker dude, fat chunky dude with a 13 inch dick. It's ridiculous, they called him the hedgehog.
Speaker 5:I remember that. Let's see, it's a very, very old video, so I wonder I can't remember you should just look up like Google Data.
Speaker 4:Remember Ron Jeremy.
Speaker 5:Oh, here it is. I'll pop the bottom of the playing handle. This is a very, very old Data Remember song.
Speaker 8:I've heard to let go.
Speaker 5:Dude, everybody was doing that fucking riff back in the day that.
Speaker 7:I remember.
Speaker 4:It's like Blink-182 shit mix.
Speaker 8:Right, I appreciate your judgment. To forget just the words you say, this must be some terrible Binoculars that you see Every move I make.
Speaker 6:So never be a liar, but you're always. I could do a hardcore dancing.
Speaker 9:You hear what's coming you.
Speaker 8:You're blind, hit by your instincts.
Speaker 9:I'm not your fucking kid, I'm not so easily paid.
Speaker 8:I'm looking down at this mess that you've made and you can't believe that I stayed.
Speaker 4:It's actually not bad. I like this. I do like this song.
Speaker 5:Where did I go wrong? I got to get out of this.
Speaker 4:It's like if you took Simple Plan and gave them a dick. That's awesome.
Speaker 5:They didn't remember. Actually, their newer stuff is actually kind of hard, but they were like a post-hardcore band back in the early 2000s. I couldn't get a good graph. It's almost like Blink-182.
Speaker 5:It is, it has pop punk elements mixed with metalcore, so they called it post-hardcore back in the early 2000s. So you take some punk and pop punk elements and you mix it with metalcore stuff and that's what you get this. But they remember it. I like a tough cookie to crack because they would come out with like and I'll show you a song from back in the day that I loved, but then they come out with like other songs that were just like what the fuck is this? It's like I can't get behind this. It's snake. It's like funny music video Fight.
Speaker 6:That's badass. Yeah, this is like. This is really really old Fucking Need to remember and this song rules. But they all have other songs that are like You're a freak, like.
Speaker 9:I made my chance With the devil. You've been at it for years but couldn't reach the next level. Let's keep it fresh. This is a competition to me, and if everyone around you I would have never guessed this was the same fucking band.
Speaker 6:It's the same band, and I think this album came out a couple years after that other song. Get the fuck over it.
Speaker 4:I love this song, so much it's really come to this Because without me, See, I get a day to remember and every time I die fucking, but I hate every time I die.
Speaker 6:And here's the opposite end of the spectrum feel pretty hard though.
Speaker 5:So, so like they, they have like the kind of. To me, a day to remember is like a band for all of your moods all in once, all in one time. You know they could be poppy and happy-go-lucky, then they could go. Yeah, fuck you, let's go. So this is a band I want, but their newer shit is actually, it actually goes kind of hard. So they've kind of reinvented themselves a little bit. Because I heard them on, I forget what it was like Liquid Metal. I'm like this is a day to remember. Shut the fuck up, they've come a long way. Hell. I remember a band that you weren't really too high on back in the day when we saw them at Sounds of the Underground Devil Wears Prada, dude. They've changed. They've changed a lot, dude. They're like a full-on fucking djenty, crazy ass, fucking metalcore shit. They're not the kind of like flip play.
Speaker 6:The keyboardist is just prancing around the fucking stage. Dude, I go. You're not helping my cause, dude, like I'm trying to get I'm telling to tell you that these dudes are awesome. And there's the fucking keyboardist fucking parading around the stage like a fancy print, you know, fancy pants. I'm like stop doing that. You're not making my argument any better.
Speaker 4:So before we only got a couple minutes left, only a couple minutes. But before we go, there's one more thing we need to talk about okay oh, you're sighing.
Speaker 5:That can't be a good.
Speaker 4:That can't be good social media media says oh okay, Beyonce has surpassed Michael Jackson as one of the all-time greatest fucking acts of all time.
Speaker 5:I saw this. Okay, I want to know who, specifically on social media, said this and I want to slap them in the fucking face because that's not even remotely true. I'm going to tell you, and like I told John before them, in the fucking face because that's not even remotely true.
Speaker 4:I'm going to tell you, and like I told John before we started the podcast, that's rage bait, if I ever heard it. All I have to do is say one instance and it debunks everything.
Speaker 5:You'll never see a crowd get so excited over minuscule movement like they did with michael jackson when he barely moved the super bowl was like a good case in point or even in his concerts.
Speaker 4:He will just stand there and stand there and you know, okay, look up a video of when the camera people saw michael jackson move, when michael knew they would clip every time he would move they would clip pictures of him so he would just be doing goofy stuff. Yeah, but yeah, they did the.
Speaker 5:Super Bowl was a really good example of that. He just stood there for it felt like 10 minutes, but the crowd just got the anticipation swolled and he's just like yeah, I think that's rage bait. In my opinion, I think that's whoever wrote that just said that just to to get generate clicks, because there's no way someone seriously is gonna fucking put michael jacks or beyonce over michael jackson a lot of people are like I don't even know one Beyonce song, which you're fucking stupid too.
Speaker 4:But cause, dude, I'm not going to say Beyonce is not fucking good.
Speaker 5:We're not saying she's not influential to to music Cause she is. But I think Michael Jackson is in a whole nother fucking realm in himself. Dude, there's, there's like there's like S tier, and then there's like there's like s tier, and then there's like people above that, like in the stratosphere. I don't think anybody will ever ever touch him as far as well maybe somebody maybe somebody did touch him, we don't know. I walked right into that joke, didn't?
Speaker 4:I michael jackson and keemar and evan kahneman boys pants half off.
Speaker 5:Ayo, that's a classic.
Speaker 4:I haven't heard that in forever.
Speaker 5:Just a little Jesus juice.
Speaker 2:Just a little Jesus juice.
Speaker 8:Hey, oh my god, oh, oh my god, dude.
Speaker 4:I was at work today and I walk in and there's like a urinal stall and there's like people, somebody shitting in the stall. I thought about pissing and going like real high pitched just to see if, like, they'd be, like what the fuck yeah piss, piss, piss.
Speaker 5:Uh, yeah, I'd say we're about, we're about out of time. So yeah, we really need to stick to our times, because I only got charged four bucks, so that's not bad, so it's okay. So I'll take, I'll, I'll take it in the ass for that one. So uh, so yeah, so we gotta stick to our time. We are out of time. We appreciate everyone who listens, who gives us feedback. You know the two people that listen. So no, I'm just kidding. If you're still here after all these years, we appreciate you.
Speaker 4:If you're, new Almost four years.
Speaker 5:I can't believe we've been doing this for over 100.
Speaker 4:Almost four years, Almost dude. That's insane.
Speaker 5:Most podcasts die out after like three months.
Speaker 4:We've been doing this for over four years, and once we hit 208 episodes, it's four years episodes.
Speaker 5:It's four years. Wow, that's crazy. Hey, we appreciate who was ever here still, and we love you um jd.
Speaker 4:Departing words for the for this episode yeah, thank you everybody for listening and um, there's really nothing to say, because if you got to the end here, uh, you're cool, uh.
Speaker 5:But basically, thank you so much for listening and, guys, we'll see you next week.
Speaker 4:I'm john rickman and I'm jason sugar. See you later, later, guys.