It's Everyday with John and Jay
We're the unapologetically raw comedy podcast that’s not afraid to push boundaries. Packed with outrageous skits, off-the-cuff banter, and original songs, John and Jay bring their no-holds-barred humor to everyday topics, wild hypotheticals, and everything in between. Whether you’re here for belly laughs or pure chaos, this is the ultimate shoot-the-shit show for anyone who loves their comedy a little rough around the edges
Check out our official merch store! shop.backinthedaypodcast.com
It's Everyday with John and Jay
Episode 177: Spaceballs 2 and Hollywood's Nostalgic Cash Grabs
Something magical happens when comedy legends decide to revisit their greatest hits. The announcement of Spaceballs 2 with both 98-year-old Mel Brooks returning and Rick Moranis coming out of retirement has sparked genuine excitement among fans who've waited nearly four decades for the sequel.
We dive deep into why this announcement matters so much – it's not just nostalgia, but a potential return to comedy that isn't afraid to push boundaries. The brilliant teaser for Spaceballs 2 mocks the endless stream of sequels, prequels, and reboots while promising "The Search for More Money." We analyze the casting choices (Josh Gad as Barf Jr.), debate alternatives (would Dan Fogler have been better?), and celebrate the return of Bill Pullman and other legacy characters.
But this episode isn't just about Spaceballs. We explore the promising Naked Gun reboot starring Liam Neeson with Seth MacFarlane producing – a combination that actually looks promising based on the trailer's clever fourth-wall breaks and wordplay. The comparison between these revivals and classics like Blazing Saddles and Tropic Thunder leads us into a broader discussion about how comedy has changed, sometimes for the worse.
There's something deeply refreshing about revisiting an era when films weren't afraid to make audiences squirm in their seats while laughing. As boundaries in comedy continue to narrow, these revivals might represent something more significant than simple cash grabs – they could be the gasps of a comedic style fighting to survive in a world that's forgotten how to laugh at itself.
Have you experienced the comedic genius of Mel Brooks or Leslie Nielsen? Share your favorite moments with us and join the conversation about whether comedy still has room to be truly daring.
Send us a text message and let us know how awesome we are! (Click the link)!
'Beavis and Butt-head' Cover art created by Joe Crawford
It's everyday with John and Jay Comedy Skits, random bullshit, tim and Jerry, it's not your day, it's not my day. This is our day and it's my day. This is our day and it's every day with John and Jay. You like racy shit, you like problems going on, you like sexual misconduct? You're in the right fucking place. Listen up, you fucking freaks. It is time to get the show on the road. We're ready to hit this episode of it's every day with john and jay.
Speaker 3:Let's rock yo, what's up, hey, what's up. Hey, we're glad you're here Every day, because it's every day with Jada J, the only show where you can hear us talk about.
Speaker 1:Pretty much anything, yeah, anything Mostly music Mostly music and movies and perverse, nasty shit.
Speaker 3:Yes, Unfiltered fun is what I call it.
Speaker 1:We got a lot to talk about. I think we need to. I think what we should do is talk about the elephant in the room this past week um, the best fucking news that I think I was hoping you just start off with that, because that is, you're talking about the one and only Spaceballs.
Speaker 3:Spaceballs 2 was just announced 98-year-old Mel Brooks.
Speaker 1:98-year-old Mel Brooks.
Speaker 3:And listen. The little teaser was hilarious Because it just took the piss out of all of these fucking cash grab sequels, especially the Disney Star Wars ones, which I fucking hate, by the way. Took the piss out of all of these fucking cash grab sequels, especially the disney star wars ones, which I fucking hate.
Speaker 1:I think here in a second we need to showcase that and like watch the teaser right right okay, so rick moran is coming out of retirement for this motherfucking movie. That is great.
Speaker 3:That's how all ghost, all ghostbuster fans are punching air right now. Spaceballs 2 is what gets Rick Moranis back.
Speaker 1:You want to know what it is. It's called the Respect of a.
Speaker 3:Legend of Mel Brooks. I would say so. It has to be some sort of respect. This is going to be Mel Brooks' probably last movie he's ever going to be in.
Speaker 1:Dick Van Dyke plays Barf, just kidding, josh.
Speaker 3:Gad is going to play Barf Jr. Is that what I read? Josh Gad, josh Gad, who's Josh Gad? Is he the one from SNL? No, you've seen the Beauty and the Beast remake the Disney one. He played LeFleur, gaston's little henchman from the Beauty and the Beast remake.
Speaker 1:Oh, is he the one that was the?
Speaker 2:Oh, no, no, he remake oh, is he the one that was the? Oh, no, no he was.
Speaker 3:He played the fucking snowman and frozen. Yeah that guy, yeah that dude. So he's gonna, he's gonna be barf jr ever now damn it you don't like. No, no, you don't like josh gad.
Speaker 1:Josh gad's okay, but it's not a role that would fit him.
Speaker 3:It doesn't seem like a role that I saw. I saw a mock-up of him in a barf. You know, costume it. It didn't look, it didn't offend me in any way. No, no, no, I'm not saying that I mean anybody could stand into that fucking role, but like personality personality wise, personality wise.
Speaker 1:But you know he does have that kind of. But you know, what I like about him is josh gad has never. He was also in the rocker as well with Rainn Wilson.
Speaker 3:Yeah, I didn't really hate that and honestly, I never thought of him.
Speaker 1:Yeah, he played this stupid snowman in fucking Frozen, but he's doing wrong. He's a good fucking actor. He did the Voice.
Speaker 3:Oh internship.
Speaker 1:He was in the internship, Remember. He's the weird guy, oh you made me talk to people.
Speaker 3:That was a dick move. Yeah that's right. Look at me, look at me, look at me. That was a dick. Uh, dude, what the hell does googliness mean? The fact that you don't know what googliness is, that means you'll never work here dude, he's so good, I heard everything you said I heard everything you said. He turns it up. You know who would have been really good. Oh wait, is he's not dead? Is he the dude from balls of fury? That's who I wanted. That's dan fogel dad fogel should have been.
Speaker 3:Oh, barf dan fogel would have been great. He would have nailed.
Speaker 1:I think he would have been a better choice, in my opinion I agree, dude fogler yeah, so when I thought of that, I'm like, but I think he this is the maybe the reason why he lost a shit ton of weight. That would make sense. You don't have the chunky barf. He doesn't have that chunky. He doesn't have the chunky barf.
Speaker 3:If it was him from Balls of Fury.
Speaker 1:You need chunky barf.
Speaker 3:If it was from Balls of Fury, that would have been perfect in my opinion oh yeah dude right on the fucking nose and you know who else.
Speaker 1:I thought dude, and obviously this is, but I know he's been in hollywood like a lot lately. Okay, jack black, but jack black is almost too over the top for this role I think you just need a.
Speaker 3:You need a subtle kind of sidekick with good comedic timing. Jack black has of a, jack black commands presence. You know what I?
Speaker 1:mean, yeah, he's over the man's presence. I think dan fogler would have been the best. I want us. I'm not gonna, okay, I'm gonna say this if somebody was like hey, dude, you know, like you have, you have to choose one to watch of sequels of like, you know, like classic hit sequels, um, and you can only choose one and it's uh happy, gum war 2 or space balls 2. I'm going space balls 2 all day, like space ball 2 looks so much better space balls 2 has more room to breathe.
Speaker 3:There's way more material to work with and I think, with mel brooks at the helm and with rick moran- I just hope mel brooks lives to make it that's a good point. Uh, if, if rick moran is didn't sign on for this movie, I don't think. I would be on board with this.
Speaker 1:Oh, Bill Pullman's in it too, bill Pullman's coming.
Speaker 3:Yeah, they got legacy characters for this film, which is huge, especially the biggest one.
Speaker 1:They dug up Joan Rivers. Her ass is going to go on this film. You can throw anybody that car 98-year-old Mel Brooks is going to be playing Yogurt again. I also was wondering what about president screw. I don't know what they're going to do with that. I was hoping he'd be back.
Speaker 3:Well, we'll see what they. We'll see what they kind of do. That's a lot for 90 year old dude, but the fact that there's so much material, especially with, like the all the new star Wars movies that have come out.
Speaker 1:They're so genius when I saw this on Star Trek that have come out. Remember the other day I was like John, is this real?
Speaker 3:And I'm like yes.
Speaker 1:Is it real?
Speaker 3:Yeah, you're like, is this real? And I saw it, like I saw it that morning, and I'm like, oh, space balls, come on, this is not being made. Then I saw actual, credible sites pick up on it.
Speaker 1:I'm like, is this real Dude?
Speaker 3:I watched Mel Brooks say it was real. Yeah, yeah, so then I saw the actual teaser from Mel Brooks himself and I'm like holy fuck boss. Then I saw oh, rick Moranis is signed on for this project.
Speaker 1:You know what I'm hoping. This is what we've been wanting since day one, but he was never allowed to do it. I'm wondering if maybe now, since it's been 40 fucking years, yeah, if, and disney owns lucas rights, all that stuff I'm wondering get merchandise, merchandising for fucking spaceballs.
Speaker 3:For once I wanted them, goddamn dolls they're finally paying off a fucking 30 year old or 30 year old fucking joke. If they don't call this spaceballs to the search for more money, it's a totally you know what's crazy is.
Speaker 1:this is what it was. Spaceballs, too, was supposed to come out, all like it was supposed to be made almost right away, but john candy passed away. Yeah, okay, right, chris farley was supposed to take that role. Okay, chris Farley passed away. So he scratched it, and that's kind of what happened, and from what I heard from when listening to Mel Brooks talk about it, I think it is going to be called space balls to the search for more money. I think that's what it is.
Speaker 3:So much it works, because these Disney Star Wars movies are such a blatant soulless cash grab. Yep, it's like. Marvel it is. The teaser perfectly encapsulates all of the shameless cash grabs from all of Hollywood in the last 30, 25, 30 years, and they list all these movies. We got a prequel to the sequel. That was actually a Dude. That's what I want, Actually. Let's go ahead and watch it.
Speaker 1:And then also, did you see, disney is buying Hulu as well.
Speaker 3:I thought, does Disney own ABC?
Speaker 1:technically Disney owns ABC. But Disney was only a partial owner. They're gonna be majority rule on hulu.
Speaker 3:Yeah, okay disney just owns everything.
Speaker 1:Disney is evil if you pull your wife's panties down and you see a mickey mouse tattoo on her ass.
Speaker 2:Disney owns who's the son of a bitch that says he ain't wearing his purity rings? Little girls, chinese, get wet.
Speaker 3:I always reference that you need to see that.
Speaker 1:I want to watch that.
Speaker 3:You want to see that? Oh, okay.
Speaker 4:Let's do that real quick dude.
Speaker 1:You said South Park.
Speaker 3:Yeah, it's a South Park.
Speaker 1:Oh my God, dude, it looks and cut Great video shoot guys, the Jonas Brothers.
Speaker 4:This is bullpucky. Yeah, we've had it. Gosh darn it.
Speaker 2:Uh-oh, looks like we've got a problem.
Speaker 4:Our decision is final. We have decided, as a band, not to wear purity rings anymore.
Speaker 2:Yeah, you tell them. Joe Boys, I know you're tired, but the purity rings are important to the company's image.
Speaker 4:We don't care about the company.
Speaker 2:And you're going to say that to the boss's face. We aren't afraid of him.
Speaker 4:Well, I hope you're right, because the boss is on his way here Now.
Speaker 2:Oh, Jesus, he's here. Boss is here. Let's be strong guys. Hello sir, how was your trip? That's all this I'm hearing about not wearing the purity rings. We'll just leave you alone.
Speaker 4:So I guess we have some issues. We need to talk about something.
Speaker 2:Oh boy, I just love flying all the way to Colorado to hear about your problems.
Speaker 4:Look, we just want our concerts to be about our music, not about purity rings.
Speaker 2:Oh gosh, fellas, let me explain this to you. I love his walk dude like ugh. You have to wear the purity rings because that's how we can sell sex to little girls, haha. See, if we make the posters with little girls reaching for your junk, then you have to wear purity rings, or else Disney company looks bad, looks bad well, we don't want to be selling sex to little girls anymore.
Speaker 2:The rings stay on, well, well maybe we'll just refuse to go on stage. You don't talk to me like that, you little piece of shit. Get the fuck up. Get the fuck up now. Do we have a problem?
Speaker 4:no sir, no mr mouse, no mr mouse.
Speaker 2:Oh, that's good, because I thought we had a problem for a minute there. Huh all, now get out there and make me some goddamn money. There's a part where he's like is it this one? You better start talking. You better start talking right now.
Speaker 4:We told you we aren't working for another studio and there isn't a plan to sabotage your big night. We came on our own because our friend's purity ring is killing him. You're lying, I'll cut you off. You see we were right about the purity rings. A nice Christian symbol can't be used for profit gains.
Speaker 2:We've all anchored God. You think God is in control here. I am in control. I've been in control since the 50s. In case you haven't noticed, you three faggots are going on stage and you three faggots aren't going to stop me. Nobody is ruining this event. I have worked too long and too hard to have anybody f*** this up. Where would you be without me? Jonas Brothers, your music sucks and you know it. It's because you make little girls Chinese tickle. And when little girls' Chinese tickle, I make money. That's because little girls are f***ing stupid and the purity rings make it okay to do whatever I want. Even the Christians are too f***ing stupid to figure out I'm selling sex to their daughters. I've made billions off of Christian ignorance for decades now, and you know why Because Christians are retarded. They believe in a talking dead guy.
Speaker 1:They believe in a talking dead guy.
Speaker 2:Oh, hello, folks. Now take it easy. Here's the Jonas Brothers. Come on, guys. No, stop, bring them back here. It's over, mr Mouse, everyone's tuning out. No, no, god damn it. No, shut up, shut up. Ah, shut up, shut up, that's it girls no more.
Speaker 3:So he comes, mickey mouse come, like he goes away, he comes back and he actually he, he gets with tolly and him and him and Stan's dad start like this drug ring in fucking China and shit like that, because Disney is expanding into China so they start like a marijuana fucking company in China. It's so fucking crazy.
Speaker 1:Like the first video. The first video is the best one.
Speaker 3:I just wanted to hear the girl shiny part, because that's what I always hear Tickle or something.
Speaker 2:I make little girls shiny. It's tickle Makes me money, makes me money, makes me money, ha ha.
Speaker 1:When he come walking in dude and he's got his arms swinging.
Speaker 2:Which one of you is wearing the purity ring? Ha ha, I've been in control since the 50s.
Speaker 3:Dude, I love Vicky about that episode. Basically, the whole episode revolves around Kenny trying to get laid by this girl and she makes him wear the purity ring, but she fucking jizzes. They go to a Jonas Brothers concert. She fucking comes from watching them and stuff. Dude, it's fucked up.
Speaker 1:I mean really, who hasn't come to a Jonas Brothers?
Speaker 3:Yeah, exactly, but so anyway, Anyway, so anyway, disney, star Wars, spaceballs 2. Yeah, let's see that, let's get back on track. So let's get to Spaceballs 2 teaser, which I laughed my ass off at Saskatchewan Spaceballs teaser. Spaceballs teaser who's Caesar?
Speaker 1:Dumb self-love.
Speaker 3:I love the Spaceballs theme. There's been a prequel trilogy, a sequel trilogy, a sequel to the prequel, a prequel to the sequel. Countless TV spinoffs, a movie spinoff on the TV spinoff, which are both a prequel and a sequel Two Dunes, seven Jurassic Parks, two, two. Dunes, seven Jurassic Parks, two avatars plus three upcoming avatars, making five avatars. 36 MCU movies with two different Robin Dowdy juniors. Dcu attempt one, dcu attempt two. That made me laugh all out.
Speaker 1:The TV series. You're making the same Harry Potter movies, prometheus, which is kind of an alien movie.
Speaker 3:Four Beatles movies and Oppenheimer and Oppenheimer right at the end. It's so random with Oppenheimer.
Speaker 1:Okay. So the reason why we're so excited about this movie number one, the biggest reason, is because you know it's going to be well done. You know what I'm saying. It's not going to be shit, Like they're not going to play on old jokes a little bit, but I think After 40 years.
Speaker 3:There he is the legend. I want that sweatshirt.
Speaker 1:You can get that sweatshirt on Amazon.
Speaker 3:Dude. I laughed my ass off when he said that, so he goes. He's like we asked what the fans want. Instead we gave them this movie. I like how he ain't taking it seriously. That's what Mel Brooks is always good for. Dude, which? Is exactly what the fucking fans want the Schwartz Awakens dude. It has to be Search for War Money, because that just pays off that joke and I'm so glad he's deciding to do it before he kicks his bucket.
Speaker 1:And this is the long awaited no joke and I'm going to say this straight up and I think we've talked about it when we did Spaceballs on our cast fucking Jesus, 200 fucking episodes ago, A long time ago. So I went to see Spaceballs in 1988 at the movie theater with my Uncle Joe, which you know my Uncle Joe took me and it was my Star Wars for the longest time I didn't watch. Have you seen Star Wars before that?
Speaker 3:No oh. Oh so you probably didn't get any of the references.
Speaker 1:I didn't watch. I love this movie on its own, on its own accord, without until. And then I watched Star Wars when I dude, when I lived on yeah, it was a while it was, I was working to level up, it was before we were uh, before we left, before I went to bellevue when we lived on walker street, yeah, yeah I laid on the couch and did you watch all six of the pre all six movies?
Speaker 1:yeah, yeah, all six movies. I will say this I did see episode one when it first came out, but that was it.
Speaker 3:I I saw all the prequels. Well, star Wars, I went and saw all the remake. They re-released it in like 93 or 94, 95. So my dad took me to see the Star Wars in theaters, which, by the way, those cuts were the best Seeing Star Wars in theaters With it redone With better sound. I know people fucking Don't like they because george lucas added some stuff and obviously, though, seeing that in theaters really is it's pulls it into perspective. My brother justin, who's one of these kind of purist people, on his little movie server he has the original cuts of and it just it looks wonky as fuck. I'm so used to the the crisp, yeah, I'm so used to the, the remake of that, the reissues. And and then when I see the like uh, when I watch a new hope or star wars because it wasn't called episode four, but I see and I just watched it he pulls, when he does the lightsaber for the first time, it looks so janky. But I mean, that's the times and I won't fault it. But when you watch the reissues, the re-release.
Speaker 3:They redid all those, the sound and the oh, it looks so good and it's like, yeah, well, seeing Star Wars in theaters is really awesome. And then I saw all three of the prequels in theaters too, which honestly I don't think they're that bad compared to the fucking sequel trilogy.
Speaker 1:The prequels look like goddamn masterful pieces of art, because I didn't um I, and if you don't like them, I get it. No, I can't say I don't like them. I, I do. Um. Like I said, I saw episode one is a tough movie to follow and I will give you that. Actually I thought it was easy a lot of people.
Speaker 3:But you know what, you know what I said. I saw episode one is a tough movie to follow and I will give you that. Actually I thought it was easy, a lot of people.
Speaker 1:But you know what. You know what I said and that's one thing I love about the new ones and I know a lot of people hate, I know you're not a fan of them, yeah but the force awakens was you know what it is? It's kind of like I look at it like metal. Um, like we talked about metal a couple weeks ago, it's, it is, it's a gateway for people to be able to understand.
Speaker 3:It was a reintroduction, it was easy to follow, it was simple, it was the same fucking story it was simple jack.
Speaker 1:It was a simple jack movie they.
Speaker 3:They kind of took pretty much all the same beats from a new simple jack, do what's that from you?
Speaker 1:make me happy.
Speaker 3:Fucking Tropic Thunder. Tropic, that's it.
Speaker 1:He plays the fucking Renly handicap. Too simple, Jack.
Speaker 3:What was I saying? Oh, so the Force Awakens was basically A New Hope, just kind of retold a little differently. So that's fine, I didn't really mind that it's the last Jedi. A new hope, just kind of retold it a little differently. So that's fine, I could, and I really mind that it's with.
Speaker 1:It's the last jedi, which I really fucking hate in rise of sky welcome to it's back in the day with john and jay, I know I feel like.
Speaker 3:This is an old school episode, but you know we're talking about space ball, so we're gonna say it's a new thing, yeah we're gonna segue into fucking star wars a little bit, because I think I've made these rants already.
Speaker 1:I know we're just a little off kilter. Yeah, can I please and I know this isn't a classic movie, it's a little like. It's maybe like 10, 15 years old or whatever. Yeah, can I please talk about the masterpiece and how much more I appreciate, a lot more than when I first watched it how much of a masterpiece and how good of a movie tropic thunder really is tropic thunder is a fucking awesome movie that will never be made, ever again.
Speaker 3:It is so fucking robert dowdy masterful is such a fucking cake dude. He was so good dude.
Speaker 1:You know who? I was really impressed with Fucking Tom Cruise. Yeah, hey, you punch that guy in the fucking face. Punch him in the fucking face, Dude that movie is amazing.
Speaker 3:Sorry, man.
Speaker 1:Punches him right in the fucking face, dude, dude, and you can barely tell it's Tom Cruise because he's bald and shit. Right right, matthew McConaughey's bitching at him like listen, we get Tevo. Listen, it's in his contract he gets Tevo.
Speaker 3:It's just a shame that we live in a society now and comedy like that can't be explored because it'll ruffle too many feathers.
Speaker 1:That's the one thing about Mel Brooks did especially Blazing Saddles.
Speaker 3:It'll ruffle too many feathers. That's the one thing. And that's the one thing about you know Mel Brooks did, and he and you know especially blazing saddles.
Speaker 1:I think space balls too can open that back up. I think it's a pretty, I don't care.
Speaker 3:I think I think we need more of that. It's just, people need to just not take themselves so fucking serious. Excuse me, sir, but you were looking for niggers. Dude Blazing Saddles is the shit.
Speaker 1:That's Blazing Saddles. By the way, yeah, I didn't want you guys to be like damn Jay, fucking put the hood back. But no, it's a no joke, it's comedy. You know what I love about that, and that is a big reason why we do what we do and why I push envelopes the way we do, is because that is fun, I think, making people squirm in your seat. That's what mel brooks did when he made blazing saddles. Uh, blazing saddles is a big one that I mean, that is the king of all fucking. Making you squirm in your seat, fucking movies.
Speaker 3:What were some other. What were some other movies like that? Did that back in the day. I know I the Monty Python guys. They made Life of Brian, which took the piss out of religion.
Speaker 1:Oh yeah, that's a hard one to do too.
Speaker 3:The Passion, which a lot of people did not like that movie when it came out it actually got banned in a ton of countries because it was basically kind of spoofing the, you know, the the passion of the Christ, which is fucking hilarious.
Speaker 1:I don't know a lot of satire movies that did a lot of that, but I know like a lot of uh Quentin Tarantino movies pushed that envelope as well. So you got glorious bastards, where it just shows people just fucking getting shot up. Um, django, django is really pushing.
Speaker 3:Oh, fucking Quentin Tarantino himself in pulp fiction. Yeah, is there a sign of science? He loves to say the end storage, he loves to say the end bombing in the movie. So good though. Um, I'm just trying to think of some other movies, maybe back then, that were like kind of risque for the time, but yet it was kind of seen as a work of art porky's would be. Porky's was like more sexually, sexually driven, like you know, but it was just a very like yeah it's like I'm just.
Speaker 1:No, I'm sorry, but I don't know, have we've had a good?
Speaker 3:have. We had a good movie like that since you know, so maybe van wilder ish kind of movies where american pie, american pie.
Speaker 1:They drove that into the ground. It was like which one's gonna come out with a new movie first Fast and Furious or American Pie.
Speaker 3:I saw like a fake. I don't know if it was fake, but I saw like a fake. American Funeral American Funeral yeah.
Speaker 1:I don't know how fake that is. Is that fake or is that real? I don't know.
Speaker 3:I saw it all over the place. It's mostly Stifler's mom. One last hurrah Now. That's when we push the fucking envelope More ways than one.
Speaker 1:Oh, there was a. No, it would be called American Funeral the Real Stiffmeister. The Real Stiffmeister, because she's dead and stiff.
Speaker 3:Dead and loving it.
Speaker 1:Oh, speaking of like, oh, dude, like those movies, those movies yeah, naked gun was a huge push in that shit and they did a lot of.
Speaker 3:Did you see the trailer for the leslie nielsen the new naked gun movie? I did not. Uh, I actually I liked it.
Speaker 1:Are you gonna lie? You know, honestly, I was looking back at some of leslie neil not leslie nielsen but uh, liam neeson god, they sound the same. Yeah, they do. It kind of works that way. Ln ln dude, that's wild. So liam neeson's old work and dude, he actually has a lot of comedy chops and he's in a million ways to die in the west yeah so he has comedy chops, so you'll see who produces this.
Speaker 3:This new naked, you'll see here in a minute.
Speaker 4:Oh, it shows who produces it.
Speaker 3:Yeah, can you see it on the screen.
Speaker 2:Yeah, once you kill a man for revenge. There's no going back. A voice in your head sang over and over.
Speaker 4:That was awesome. Who are you driven, detective Frank driven?
Speaker 2:thanks, hi daddy, it's me Frank jr love you, hey, dad boy, do I miss you dude, that guy would have played barf really well.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I agree. The dude from Cobra Kai yeah, I need a bathroom.
Speaker 4:I need this room immediately. There's a line, ma'am.
Speaker 1:Police business oh he's eating it again. He's eating it again, dude, seth MacFarlane. I'm here, lieutenant, I think someone murdered my brother.
Speaker 2:Please take his chair. Thank you, Dude. That's taking good right there. This is what I do. Says you serve 20 years for man's laughter, you mean?
Speaker 4:man Slaughter Must have been quite the joke. Do this by the book Show a little respect, why?
Speaker 2:Who's going to arrest me? Other cops yes, is he?
Speaker 4:serious? Is he serious?
Speaker 1:No, it seems this driver might be more of a problem than we thought. Why don't you keep an eye on? Rest assured I won't stop until I found justice.
Speaker 4:What do you want, little one? Your ass. Nobody messes with the police squad. We've upgraded your car with the most advanced crime-fighting tech Drive forward 30 feet.
Speaker 2:Very smooth.
Speaker 1:This place is falling apart, Dude. You know what sucks is. It comes out August 1st, my workplace. I already signed up for it, even though it was my first day.
Speaker 3:Yeah.
Speaker 1:They're giving away mud hens tickets for the August 1st for any employee that wants to go. Oh, okay, yeah, so, and then you can buy extra tickets for $11 a piece. So I'm like my work does Columbus Clippers, but that's pretty cool. I don't know what the hell. Who are they for? Uh?
Speaker 3:cause. I know Clevelandveland. They're cleveland's affiliate really oh, that'd be really cool. Yeah, yeah, um, but yeah, dude, what she said, when he said pull up a chair, she just took the chair out.
Speaker 1:I was like, okay, that's, that's pretty on par with fucking naked naked guide dude, like you said and you pointed out when we did naked gun.
Speaker 3:Um, he fucking walks around the wall, dude yeah, it's so subtle and it's there needs to be like there. I love this. It's one of those movies you keep watching and watching and you find little hell. Carrie found something a while ago when we watched it. She goes you know it's the pictures flipped or no? No, she's like the letters on the door were like flipped upside down or some weird shit like that. It was just out of the blue like oh my god it is.
Speaker 1:I never caught that like you find something new. It's an easter egg, right. It's like, uh, every time you watch it there's something new. You find, um, I just, it looks amazing.
Speaker 3:I just what I just love, dude. The part that made me laugh the most was the man's laughter joke.
Speaker 1:It must have been a hell of a joke.
Speaker 3:It must have been a hell of a joke. So you served 20 years for man's laughter, you mean manslaughter. It must have been a hell of a joke.
Speaker 2:Dude, I never thought of that dude.
Speaker 3:That's so funny, that's hilarious, that's so good. I mean, come on, I was totally on board.
Speaker 1:I'm like yeah, I was totally on board. The one that really got me Was the first Probably the first ten seconds when he's in the car In the hand of a coffee, like a studio assistant In the hands of a coffee.
Speaker 3:While he's driving in the car. There was a screen behind him and he was driving. You know how they Drive in cars and movies they have screens. So it's just like he's pretending to drive and the dude gives him the coffee.
Speaker 1:Oh, thank you just kind of put light into the fact that it's a movie. It's a movie it's self-aware it takes the fourth wall breaking.
Speaker 3:I love shit like that. If this movie is going to be anything like this trailer, I am so happy dude, I'm so glad'm so glad Seth MacFarlane is working on it. Right, I think he will show this movie respect.
Speaker 3:He knows this genre very well, so we're going to get Spaceballs 2 and the Naked Gun all within maybe a few years. So this is going to come out in August. Then we're going to get Spaceballs in a few years after that. Oh, is it supposed to be in a couple of years? I think it's at 2027, right?
Speaker 1:Jesus Christ, I don't think Mel Brooks is going to make it. He better get on.
Speaker 3:I think that's what it said, right, I could be wrong.
Speaker 1:Who knows? I think yeah, it did say 2027. It said that Schwartz awakens 20. Damn, it's going to take a few years, evidently, damn, I don't know if I'm going to be around then.
Speaker 3:Oh, we need to take a break. We're like way over time here, so I told you.
Speaker 1:we got a lot to talk about. Well, the second half is going to be a little bit shorter, I think yeah.
Speaker 3:So we're going to do this little ditty for you, and if it makes you hungry, then that's awesome.
Speaker 2:So we'll oh, oscar, I'm really pissed sure kidnap the human, destroy the machine, yeah he just wanted us out of the way.
Speaker 1:Where have all? Damn, that was a little early. This fucking thing keeps going and going. Where have all the good food gone? Man, for all the gods, I would like a euro, please, with a side of tater tots. Can you please just give me some with a little bit of ketchup, and I bet I won't get any, cause my wife will fucking hate me. Need a euro with some greek and delicious fucking sauce. Gotta be nice and it's gotta be strong, and I want it to the land of the lost.
Speaker 1:I need a euro made a lamb or maybe even a little chicken and I know it's gonna be really fucking good, cause this motherfucker's finger licking. Give me that finger licking.
Speaker 3:This song is not six minutes long, no way.
Speaker 1:Somewhere after fucking noon. Where is that food truck? I asked somebody to tell me where it is. They said I can go get fucked. I'm like man, that wasn't very nice, can't you be fucking nice to me? And I said I'll fucking beat your ass, I'll eat a euro and punch you in your feet.
Speaker 2:I need a euro.
Speaker 1:I'm holding out for a euro in the end of the night. It's gotta be delicious, it's gotta be fun and it's gotta be wrapped up right. I need a euro. I'm holding up for that creaky, delicious sauce. Don't care what I have to fucking pay, don't give a shit what the fucking cost. I need a. I need a. I need a euro. Holding up for a euro until the night. I need, I need. Do I have to break it? Miami?
Speaker 3:Vice shit. It says the song's six minutes and 32 seconds Fucking 90%, god damn.
Speaker 1:This is like the 80s pop Metallica song.
Speaker 3:So you got like three minutes of fucking, fucking solos Of this. We should just get a Euro while we wait. Yeah, with the tzatziki sauce and the lettuce and everything. That's what that sauce is called, tzatziki sauce. Tzatziki sauce, it's like cucumber sauce. Yeah, it's delicious. A little bit of lamb, mmm. A little bit of lamb.
Speaker 1:Mmm Up where the mountains run and where the Euros come with flight. I just want to make sure somebody makes my Euro tonight. I want to eat it slow, or maybe I will fucking eat it fast, but my wife will tell me that the shit will come flooding out my ass.
Speaker 3:You want a key change, motherfucker.
Speaker 1:Need a euro. I'm holding out for the euro. It's the best in the place. I don't give a fuck. Give me some more napkins, because this shit's getting all over my face. I need a euro. I can't wait to smash this fucking delicious delight. Can't wait to get home and I'm going to use this euro to give me protein to fuck my wife. I need a gyro. I need a gyro. I don't know if you knew I need a euro. Yeah, we got fired by the food truck. We had one. It was down the street here. Yeah, need a euro. I'm holding up for a euro made from that guy. Hey guy, come over here and make my euro. Hey guy, come here here and make my Euro. Hey guy, come here.
Speaker 3:I need a Euro Extra lamb. Let's go. What's the fries? I prefer Todd's. It's a baklava.
Speaker 1:You don't have any Euros.
Speaker 2:That's borscht, that's borscht, that's borscht, go back to Russia, russia.
Speaker 3:This is chaos. Anyway, I never had a euro with chicken in it.
Speaker 2:It just seems kind of inauthentic to me. Yeah.
Speaker 4:I don't know, I don't really care.
Speaker 1:To be quite honest, I don't know. I never really thought of Euros until just this song. Well, maybe we'll go get one when this, uh, when this solo's over. Nah, I'm actually to tell you the truth, I don't really like euros. Oh well, well, forget that then. I would rather just have some chicken tendies.
Speaker 3:Oh well, that works. Everybody loves chicken tendies.
Speaker 4:Oh well, that works. Everybody loves chicken tendies. Yo, what's up? Welcome back to the Best Freakin' Podcast. It's Every Day with Jon and.
Speaker 1:Jay, baby, listen, you don't keep listening. I'm coming over to your house and licking your wife's asshole, Sticking my tongue up on your dirt button.
Speaker 2:You got that motherfucker Now check it out, hi everybody, hey, what's up?
Speaker 1:I'm Ranger Rick. Can I change my name? I need to change it. I don't like my character, ranger.
Speaker 3:Rick.
Speaker 1:Remember that fucking puppet. Thing.
Speaker 3:Oh yeah, Seth MacFarlane.
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah, so I hope you enjoyed that song. We used to have a place here in town that was phenomenal.
Speaker 3:Delicious, delicious food truck.
Speaker 1:I never really gave it a chance. When I first went there, he was a connoisseur of his art. You know what I'm saying, which I understand.
Speaker 3:Did you ever have it when he had his food truck? Did you ever eat at that? No, oh dude, it was so good.
Speaker 1:It was called Put-N-Pita, put-n-pita, yeah, put-n-pita, yeah. And he restaurant like an actual sit-down, fucking. Hey, come and enjoy a restaurant. I think he would have been really successful, he probably would have been one of the top places, I think. So, dude, it's one that I hear. I'm pretty much almost the lonely island over here, just kind of like I didn't really care for it, but I only ate it. When he first opened he was all about like hey.
Speaker 2:Hey, how's it going?
Speaker 1:Hey, like hey. Hey, how's it going? Hey, we're filming here. Shut the fuck up. God damn, we're recording. I know somebody's dying, but can you do it?
Speaker 3:quiet. Hey, could you like not die when we're recording inside sirens please?
Speaker 1:so um, but anyway, um, he was uh, he was uh, uh, like, he was like hey, you either eat it my way or the highway, and that's it.
Speaker 3:That's so weird to me, because he was always like, hey, what you want?
Speaker 1:What you want on it. No see, and it's good that he was like that, but he used to be Really. He was an asshole Really. But you know what? I met him a couple times. He came to Level Up after he stopped doing the stuff and he diamondopolis or yeah, something like popadopolis or something.
Speaker 3:Yeah, and he's greek, he's an actual. His family actually owns a restaurant, I think somewhere like I'm not sure where exactly, but I think his family did own a restaurant so I mean it was legit.
Speaker 2:He comes from like a line ancestry yeah, of greek, but I say a little prayer for you.
Speaker 1:It's going to be the song next week. Oh yeah, that'd be hilarious, but I but when I got it, dude, it was no like hey, I mean, I'm not a fan of tomato. I fucking hate tomato the only tomatoes I don't mind. Or when they're diced or stewed, cooked those are like or a little mashed up stick of bit of stew. Like Taco Bell, like their tomatoes on their shirt. I love their tomatoes.
Speaker 4:Oh, the little diced, tomatoes.
Speaker 1:Yeah. See, I like those oh good but I am not a fan of like. If you put tomatoes on a bread I think it just steals the flavor. The flavor I'm not a huge like a lot of people are like. I like celery.
Speaker 3:Celery takes flavor, like if it's something I don't like, dude it gets. I like celery by itself. Okay, so eat a butter on. I imagine oh see, I don't mind that but I don't mind, like I don't like celery, like chicken salad. Yeah, that's what I'm talking about.
Speaker 1:Not a fan, not a fan, but here, here's how I look at it. Uh, celery making a texture, but I agree with you tomatoes if you have something in something that you don't like, you pick that flavor out. You could pick it out. So like I imagine it like you're not big on onions either, are you? I like?
Speaker 3:onions, or is it lettuce I'm thinking of? No, I like this. Well, there's something else you don't like cucumbers I don't like cucumbers. I don't know, but um, but anyway.
Speaker 1:but I look at it like this like when I'm eating a sandwich and if it's got tomato or if it's got like, or if there's celery, like if it's cooked celery, I don't mind it, but if it's celery in a chicken salad or something like that, dude, I look at it like, um, like what a racist looks at a black guy. You know, that's kind of how I look at it I really hate it, with utter affection yeah, or utter disgust, oh, whichever.
Speaker 3:Oh, that's it do you like, like celery, and say like, like a stew or like like cooked down yeah, soup or something yeah okay, you stole. I I'd hate when people put celery in egg salad or chicken salad. I fucking.
Speaker 1:I never had it in egg salad. Thank God, people put it in egg salad, whoa.
Speaker 3:Yeah.
Speaker 1:Fuck. You know what I like to do Ruin my food, arnold.
Speaker 3:Vending. Does that dude? They used to. I don't know if they do anymore. I haven't had their egg salad in a long time, but they used to put little fucking things. It's supposed to give it texture, maybe I don't know, because it crunch, but crunch yeah, well, you broke, bastards.
Speaker 1:Put bacon, put bacon in for real dude. I'm telling you what dude. Celery ruins it just. But the good news about celery if you're a huge fan of celery crunchy water, it is the only food you can eat and lose weight while eating it. It costs, it takes more calories to chew it than it does to than it it has in it. Did you know that? Did not know that? Yeah, it's the only food that you lose weight while eating, but you can't put peanut butter on it to defeat smorgasbord.
Speaker 3:Oh bullshit, I can't put like fucking whipped cream on it or something.
Speaker 1:Me. What I like to do is I like to stick the end of the celery into my wife's mouth and then jizz down like a straw. Like a fucking tunnel or something yeah, or like a trough.
Speaker 3:Like a luge. It's a spooge luge. Dude, you're going for the gold medal there bud, I am man.
Speaker 1:Oh, dude, I play her fucking nation's music. When I get done, dude, you can wave that flag, baby. Wave that flag, baby. Keep that skull, baby Keep that skull baby Ew.
Speaker 3:I do like tomatoes though I like to slice tomatoes up and eat them just straight up, Dude.
Speaker 1:I wish you know what else. A little salt and pepper. People are like you don't like tomatoes. I'm like listen, dude.
Speaker 3:My wife doesn't like tomatoes.
Speaker 1:She don't. No, it's not like I choose not to like them. Dude, and that's what I was trying to argue with somebody. Dude, I don't like. I'm like well, I want to make myself, I want to make my life a lot harder, I just don't like this food.
Speaker 1:No, because if you go to burger king, you go to any fast food restaurant, you go to any restaurant actually which has burgers and tomatoes are a common denominator in the fucking burger. So the problem is that. So I have to be an asshole and be like no tomatoes. You know like. I would rather just be like. I would like that burger please.
Speaker 3:A lot of times it's a.
Speaker 1:Usually it's a, a burger with like the like a whopper is kind of bigger burgers have the tomatoes on it so if you just get a regular cheeseburger, it's ketchup smashed tomatoes smashed tomato.
Speaker 3:You like ketchup, right?
Speaker 1:I love ketchup, okay, yeah but it's not one of my favorite. Like I don't eat ketchup with everything me, I like the flavor of food so you put ketchup on fries? Do not okay unless they're too okay if they're potatoey, like you know the fries when they get like if you cook them at home and they're not all the way done and they're just kind of potato, they're not crisp yeah, they're potatoey like steak fries. Right, I put ketchup on those because, dude, I don't like that fucking gritty potatoey shit taste.
Speaker 3:With fast food fries I don't, but with fresh cut fries from a restaurant I will put some ketchup on it.
Speaker 1:Nope, I don't either. I like the flavor of everything, me, and that's why I don't like. If you don't have relish, I'm not putting ketchup, mustard or anything. I hate relish. But if you have relish, I'm putting relish, ketchup and mustard on my hot dog. Oh my God, new.
Speaker 3:York city? They don't even let you. Or is it Chicago? You don't even get ketchup as an option for hot dogs. It's like sacrilegious or some shit. Really.
Speaker 1:They gatekeep the fuck out of their hot dogs. Maybe it was Chicago or New York, I can't remember which one?
Speaker 2:Probably New York, because it brings all the rats out. That's probably what happens. Did you Turtles do?
Speaker 3:Yes, major League Buttkicking is back in town. Oh yeah, dude, that part as a kid was like the whole theater erupted.
Speaker 2:Yeah, turtles.
Speaker 1:When they first came on. They came out in the sewer, yeah now you face donatello bring me, bring me a hot dog, please michael angelo get away from there.
Speaker 3:Oh, that'll be it. And the clock's ticky, dude, and I want extra pepperoni. You put anchovies on that and you're in deep trouble, dude, that movie is so good. We were talking about that a little bit ago, like before. We recorded, like how at least I did I mentioned that 1990 Ninja Turtles. Oh yeah, we did. We were never, we'll never be matched, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever ever. Those fucking Michael Bay turtle movies were complete garbage.
Speaker 1:The Seth Rogen one was pretty good, though I did like that one. Yes, the animated one.
Speaker 3:The two animated ones are actually pretty decent.
Speaker 1:I like how dude. I love how we could see the downfall of April O'Neil's sex appeal just kind of just fall off. She's not allowed to be a sexy woman anymore.
Speaker 3:And that kind of goes along with. You know they're doing that with a lot of like Dude 1989 or 87 fucking animated series, that fucking jumpsuit dude. Oh, even Judith Howick or whoever.
Speaker 1:I would have rubbed my fucking dick against that leather outfit all day. Dude, you could hear the crinkle.
Speaker 3:You could hear the slickness of leather dude.
Speaker 1:Uh, I was more of an irma guy myself, but what was the other was a nerd. It was a nerdy dude, remember. We couldn't figure out. I couldn't remember what his name was herman oh, dude why do we always forget this?
Speaker 3:every time? Is it herman? No, no, I don't think it's hermit max max, max Max and Irma Max and Irma no, I don't remember Irma.
Speaker 1:Niles Giles. God damn it, God. What was that dude's name?
Speaker 3:Uh, TMNT 1987.
Speaker 1:It was the old cartoons, yeah yeah, yeah, irv Merv Merv.
Speaker 4:Pervert.
Speaker 3:Seven Camera guy Vernon.
Speaker 1:Vernon.
Speaker 3:You were close dude, yeah, I do. It was like Murph.
Speaker 1:He looks like a dude that you beat the shit out of and fucking punch out.
Speaker 2:He does, he does, he does dude, he does, he does, he does, he does, he does, he does, he does, he does, he does, he does, he does, he does dude.
Speaker 1:Ding. I love that game. That game was so good, dude. But yeah, vernon Waldrip, vernon Waldrip. Oh, poor Walba girls. Walba girls Say hi to the Woolworths.
Speaker 3:Yeah, dude, irma. Yeah, you're seeing the desexualization of pretty much any female character. It just sucks.
Speaker 1:But then they come out with Barbie.
Speaker 3:They come out with Barbie, which okay, and Margot Robbie played Barbie.
Speaker 1:Oh dude, she was Smoke Show. Dude, Margot Robbie kills everything. I drank her bath water. I fucking hated the barbie movie never seen it actually oh man, I don't want to ruin it for you if you're unless you're not gonna, just I'm not gonna okay, just fucking.
Speaker 3:They made ken a bad guy, right, okay, I, I heard I fucking hate that dude.
Speaker 1:Ken was always her boyfriend and sidekick. Why would you make him a bad guy?
Speaker 3:I'm just ken, that's. I saw the music.
Speaker 1:Fucking some of the dude. They. It was like medea.
Speaker 3:They showed the funny parts in the fucking trailers yeah, I read that kid's story, or his character was not very fleshed out.
Speaker 1:I hated it. Dude, like the beginning was cool because everything was perfect. It was just barbie land. Dude, it was awesome, so great, um, but it was just whatever, dude so how do they frame?
Speaker 3:it like he? Was he some sort of like obsessive kind of he was obsessed with her?
Speaker 1:I think he kicked her to the like. She went to the real world and then he kind of took over, like kind of made it ken's world, where like now, all him and the boys just kind of got together, all the ken was.
Speaker 3:It was like the was it like the kens were like emasculated and they don't have a very good role in the barbie society because barbie's ruled the world or something is one of those like social commentary kind of god.
Speaker 1:I hated it.
Speaker 3:Dude, it's a fucking toy movie everything doesn't have to have a fucking social comment. Listen, there's a time and place. Time and place. Barbie is not the time nor the place for social commentary like that. I'm sorry, it should just be a fun fucking movie about toys.
Speaker 1:Next we're going to have a fucking Lego movie.
Speaker 2:Do Transformers have that?
Speaker 1:No, it's going to be the transgender I knew, dude.
Speaker 3:I set you up for that joke too. Yes, I set you up for that joke too. It's like, yeah, transformers are going to be the transgenders. It's like I am a girl.
Speaker 1:But, then, like another time there's a penis hanging there, like the car got a spoiler added on to it and that turns into its dick Bubblebee. I don't know what bathroom to use. It clearly says right it's like this man's watching me over in the corner. My name is Optimus Prima.
Speaker 3:It writes itself. It really does Dude, oh my.
Speaker 1:God, anyway, okay. So on another note, just kind of current event stuff. Dude, we played a Mohawk yesterday. We played a Mohawk for the Tiffin University golf outing. Oh yeah, how did that go? Amazing, dude. Me, Billy and Steve shot six under at Mohawk. I'm sure you did not win. No, we didn't. Somebody was already talking about winning, like negative 12 and shit.
Speaker 3:Oh, shut the fuck up, Dude for us, for us getting negative six basic golfers.
Speaker 1:I was fucking stoked. That's pretty good Drives. We're on fucking point. My brother Okay, so my brother comes out.
Speaker 1:Well, just to start this off, about a week, week and a half ago I went golfing with my buddy, one of my coworkers at Vostro Country Club. His name is Jeff. He's amazing, he's just a good guy. His name is Jeff, he's amazing, he's just a good guy. Same humor nasty, gross, perverse humor. But is a little bit older and he's just super cool. So we were getting drunk on the golf course. I was drinking Bud's Select and we're both fucking just saying nasty shit, racist, fucking, gross, gross shit.
Speaker 1:Okay, so anyway, he goes, I'm swinging and I'm fucking topping the ball and it's just going maybe 10 feet in the air and it comes straight down and just rolls down Like it just top spin on it. He's. I'm like I don't understand. I started off the year doing great and this is all of a sudden happening. What the fuck is going on? He goes you're leaning back, dude. He goes, you're stepping back. So what you're doing is you're lining up and when you go to swing, you're stepping back and your club's coming up across the ball and putting spin on it, top spin, and he's like that's what you're doing. He goes, what you need to do and the problem that I have and a lot of no unsolicited golf advice. Oh, I took this and this worked great, oh I took this and this worked great, okay, okay.
Speaker 1:So a lot of golfing is an exchange of weight, like you're bringing your weight from the back to the front because you need that shit to push that ball through, right, right, I was keeping all my weight in the back and I wasn't doing anything for the front, so I'm just sitting there, so it's all arms. He goes put all your weight on your front foot. He goes to start with that. Rather than trying to transfer, it's transferring weight. That's what it is. Yeah, rather than transfer, put all your weight on your front foot. I started doing that. I'm crushing that fucking ball soon, straight fucking nailing it. So steve was doing that during my mohawk. He started doing the same fucking thing. I said, dude, you're doing exactly what I did Load that front foot loaded. Sit that motherfucker down. Steve still slices like a bastard. Yeah, he can never fix that, so he just plays it Not as bad as I used to, but he still still slices. Do you start crushing that fucking ball? Dude? Started crushing that fucking ball, dude. And then billy out of the fucking woodwork. I used to be able to like I don't know about a month ago. Um, billy would hit his driver, I would hit a five iron and I'd match him with a five iron to his driver okay, billy was crushing that fucking ball yesterday. They loved mohawk. They're like man, we gotta play again. We're gonna play next year. I said you guys down for next year. He's like yeah, we're down because it's 225 a person.
Speaker 1:But you park, they have the carts lined up and ready. You park right by your cart on the grass, so your cart's right there. You just unload, put it right on um for swag. Um, I got a tiffin university umbrella. I got a tiffin university bucket hat. Tiffin University igloo ice cold cooler cup. Okay, tiffin University ball marker, I get one of those. I got one of those in Tiffin University. Tees, free sleeve of balls. Bunch of snacks. Tiffin University ball rides. Tiffin University fucking like hard shell nuts.
Speaker 3:And shit like that Did you guys get fed and stuff like that.
Speaker 1:Oh yeah, dude, it was okay. So then I was looking at the TU guy kids, they all have these fucking bad. I almost wore it tonight. I should have, dude. They have these badass Hawaiian Tiffin University shirts that have like claw marks and shit like that on them. Oh nice, they were $20. I bought one. I'm like, yeah, I really want one. And then we got a TU shirt for free as well. And then they had these fucking little energy breakfast snacks called Power Waffles and they're like they give you a little bit of energy. They're not a lot of calories. They were fucking delicious and they're like how much are these? They're like how much are these? They're like free. Me and Steve are like we're grabbing a whole bunch, dude. Oh really, oh well, that's a whole subject of a lot. So we grabbed those, food-wise okay. So they didn't have food to start with besides those power waffles and they had the snacks. So, whatever we go out, we're on the fifth tee box, where we're starting. Start there, get. Fifth tee box is where we're starting. Start there, get done.
Speaker 1:Played through the first nine. The rest of the first nine we come back up. We got an eagle we actually got and one of the holes, dude. This is what's cool about it too, dude. It's an experience, a whole fucking thing. Every hole has a prize, okay. So every hole, there's something special going on.
Speaker 1:The one hole we did was it was called a cannon hole and we only had three people in our group, so I got to hit twice, a lot of times, because you know, sure, so it's called a cannon hole, so you pay $20. Each of you get this air pressurized fucking cannon to shoot a ball dart out of towards the fucking green. This thing shoots 300 yards. Holy shit, dude, you can see the green. They're, like the green's about 293 yards away. Yeah, so you aim right at the green. So I'm like that fucker went right on the green. It was probably about 20 feet from the hole. The other guys got to shoot too and we're all off. Dude, like, my first shot was way off, but I nailed the green. It was probably about 20 feet from the hole. Okay, the other guys got to shoot too and we were all off. My first shot was way off, but I nailed the green with that one. We putt, putt, putt, and then I'm like, okay, well, I'm going to do the last one because I know exactly the line Putt Right in First one to get an eagle. We got an eagle on that fucking hole because of that Nice hole, because of that nice, so you could like and there's fun things like it only costs like five bucks, like um the last hole or um it was the second of the last hole.
Speaker 1:Um, you paid, we each paid five bucks and you got to spin and it was a par five. It's a long fucking par five. You got to spin this wheel and um, billy spins first. I paid for all of us to do it. Billy spins first. He gets negative three on our fucking scorecard. So, whatever we get on that hole, we get to take three strokes off. Oh, okay, yeah, I spin big prize, I get a big gift prize. I got this fucking Nike shoe bag to put my golf shoes in for free, nice.
Speaker 1:Okay, steve spins, he gets a negative one. We're not allowed to compound them, so he didn't get to use his. But we get there. We get a par on the hole minus three. Okay, so we got a two. It was like we hit a par five and hit it in on the second shot.
Speaker 3:Like an albatross or whatever Never us. Never going to happen, not us.
Speaker 1:So I mean that's part of our score. That's never going to happen Not us. So I mean that's part of our score.
Speaker 3:That's why we did so well.
Speaker 1:But, dude, it was only $5. It wasn't like you were paying Like last year. I remember some of the games. I even told some of the TU people I said last year this just in that was TU telling me to stop talking about how awesome this thing is.
Speaker 1:Last year it was like $100 to play these games. Like, dude, throw $100 down. It was $25 a person. I was nervous. This year I didn't spend any more than my tip from the wedding Saturday, so I just gave them like it was $20 here, $20 there, $20 there. We also got mulligans. I paid for those. It was $60 for all of us to be in the skins and for all of us to have a mulligan.
Speaker 1:The food fantastisch, my good man. Okay. So coming around the bend, when we get done with nine, they have barbecue, pulled pork right there, sliders, which is you could take a bag of chips. They had the MST gold sauce, which is their Tiffin University signature. Oh, okay, holy shit, is that stuff good? I actually have a whole jar at home from last year. I haven't used it yet.
Speaker 1:Um, and then when you go like so we're going off a 10, so we didn't even get to do this till later. But so we, so we go off that, we go head out to 10, hit that hole on 11. There's a um's. I think it was. No, it wasn't 11, it was. It might have been, it might have been 12 or 13. There was Marcos Pizza. So we got a slice of Marcos Pizza. Okay, you know, you can eat as much as you want. They're like Go get dick whatever you want. I said don't tell them that Steve was up there. I said don't tell them that, because they'll tell you to just put the piece on the plate and they'll take the goddamn box.
Speaker 1:So um and then, um, a couple holes later, god, what the fuck. They had something else. I can't remember what the fuck it was, but it was just ridiculous. The, the beer, all the beer you could drink if you wanted. All the trulies or whatever, the fucking seltzers. You wanted all the pop, all the water, anything you wanted was all free, all day, nice, all free. So then we get around to the first hole and there's a DJ there. The only thing I think kind of sucked is that you couldn't pick your music, like you had to choose a number between one and whatever, and whatever number you chose that was available, he would play that song. And I'm like, ah man, because I was like dude, I wanted let's Go by, lil Jon, let's go If you want it, you can get it, oh yeah.
Speaker 1:No, and he announces you onto the first tee box. So ours was a safety dance. That's what we ended up getting, which I was stoked about. We were all laughing our ass off. We're like, yeah, dude, so we get out there and he goes up to the first tee Tee Town DJ gets in there, dude, and he's like you can leave your friends behind doing that whole thing. I'm like, dude, what a great song. We accidentally chose that.
Speaker 1:I mean that kind of worked out. It did. It was awesome, crushed it. Dude, had a blast fucking day. Left there, went to Finley. Went to Ralphie's again the place to be, the place to be. Yeah, went to Ralphie's again. Took Sarah again um, took sarah, we went, you know, I picked her up, we went out there, came back to town, met at your uncle adam's um because his his wedding's coming up. So you know, chloe's never my newest dj hasn't met with any clients yet, so it's her first one she's had companies doing the fucking.
Speaker 1:We're doing it. Yeah, I'm gonna be there, though. Yeah, I'll be there too. So I'll be dude, we'll be able to hang out and shit. Yeah, that's, that's cool. So, dry humping In galore. Yes, my mind's telling me, no, I do, but my mind's telling me yes too.
Speaker 3:I do hope there is a slow dance in our future.
Speaker 1:Oh, dude, I would laugh. Dude, I'm not kidding, I'll fucking call you, I'll pull you hand out, dude, dude, I'd go Grab my hand. Dude, we go out. Dude, your wife would be like what the fuck? Yeah, she'd be like what the fuck? We just got to do that little shimmy like those old people do, yeah dude.
Speaker 1:But anyway, went over there, gave your uncle a lot of good ideas and things like that to kind of help them get go through stuff. And uh, and I told your uncle adam, I said dude, you know, I appreciate you going with our business and going with my company. And I said you know, like obviously you know we were in faffel for years, I've known you for years and uh, he's got some pretty cool things planned for, like in tribute to your grandpa and stuff, because dude, your grandpa was a legend.
Speaker 3:Dude, dude, it's just. That's all you can say. Yeah, absolutely.
Speaker 1:And I even told him. He never heard the story about what your grandpa said to me and Sarah.
Speaker 4:I think I told you didn't, I yeah.
Speaker 1:I think you told me this About the back brace.
Speaker 2:Yeah, dude.
Speaker 1:Is that legendary? He goes really. He said that.
Speaker 3:I said was really? He said that? I said, yeah, he did. He told me and sarah, he goes. You know, she got that back brace right, caught her in the bathroom. Dude, I'm like what now did? Did he say it with a smile or did he do like, did he say with a serious look on his face? I don't remember. I think it was, because sometimes he'll do one or two things he he'll. He'll play it off like he's being serious and he's really good at that, or he'll say it kind of with a wink, you know, smiling a wink and I told Adam.
Speaker 1:I said the reason why? Because your Uncle Adam had all the Cleveland sports. I said the reason why that guy never fucked with me and your Grandpa Because that was my biggest fear. They're like wait until you meet Grandpa Adam, dude, wait until you meet Grandpa Brickner.
Speaker 3:He's going to fuck with you. He's unpredictable.
Speaker 1:He's going to mess with you and I'm like nervous because I'm like dude, I want to get Raz. I've been Raz my whole goddamn life dude. So I go over there. Not one Raz dude. He just asked me who I was and he goes ah, so you're Sarah's new Sarah's boyfriend, huh, so what's your favorite teams? And I told him I spouted him off he goes good, that was it. It wasn't anything else, wasn't a whole lot of anything else.
Speaker 1:if you would have told him anything else you would have got it 100% and I was telling your uncle Adam when, like he's like you know when Kevin would sit in his chair and get your Michigan loving ass out of my fucking chair.
Speaker 2:Get the hell out of my chair. What the?
Speaker 3:hell's wrong with you, son of a bitch. Oh, he hated. When we were younger we would go off into one of the other rooms in the front of the house and we'd get louder.
Speaker 2:He'd be like hey, no shit around farting around, messing around back there hey.
Speaker 1:He was just like no joke.
Speaker 3:He did not like rowdiness, he was he was.
Speaker 1:He is like his stories and him. He's just a legend dude, he just is. He's just and like he's so highly respected because he was like I don't know, like yeah, he was goofy, but he had a like he's, he had a heart of gold, he was just a good guy.
Speaker 3:He was goofy but he had a like he's. He had a heart of gold.
Speaker 1:He was just a good guy he was. He was ornery and and my, my old man, grandpa, my old man except for my grandpa beat the shit out of my grandma no, I don't think. My grandpa, no, my grandpa oh my grandma knew what a fist was real fast to tell you that.
Speaker 3:Get them dishes done, bitch no, even though my grandma kind of waited on my grandpa kind of hated foot, that was just kind of the style back then.
Speaker 3:But my grandpa was very, you know, that's love I think a lot of it was there was a lot of love and gentleness, even though you know my grandma, you know, was a homemaker and stuff like that. But you know there was a lot of respect and lovingness and tenderness with you know he never, never said a crossword to her, never, never did anything out of spite or meanness. And now he would get, he would get grumpy and ornery, you know he would, he would, that's what they do.
Speaker 1:Dude, I think we're getting into that dude.
Speaker 3:See, my, my dad is starting to exhibit grandpa brittner traits and my it's, my mother, is starting to kind of notice that and if my dad's like my dad's, like I'm not like that, and we're like you kind of show it signs of it a little bit, dad has to hit him in the heels.
Speaker 3:It does, dude, it does because first of all, that's about a boo-boo. So like we kind of like, because he does that adam brickner like. So my dad's hearing is going really bad. He can't hear very well. So, joe, so we're trying, we be patient, my dad be like what? You know what? So Joe's talking and Joe be like ah, joe's got to repeat himself and he's like boy.
Speaker 2:I can't fucking hear anything.
Speaker 3:You know he gets that mouthy gape look.
Speaker 1:His fucking wide eyes, dude. I can see his wide eyes, dude.
Speaker 3:Boy, I can't fucking hear out of my ears. It's like God, just me and Justin would be standing there going Jesus, that's Adam Brickner all over again and it's like sheesh, it's like seeing double. But my grandpa was a little bit more ornery when he got older. My dad's still kind of evenly keeled, but my grandpa would exhibit, you know, kind of not really strange behavior, but he would, he would be eccentric, if you will. But when we were younger, he, he would. Just he would do things like he'd tell us to make he's gonna go to the bathroom because he didn't bring any money. He forgot his wallet and he would say this with a stone fucking say I'm really good at that too, and I think I developed I'm really good at that as well, and I could.
Speaker 3:I could go along with that but as a kid, as a nine-year-old, me and my cousin josh are like, is he freaking serious? And he'd go off to the bathroom and we'd be like, oh man, we're gonna have to wash dishes or something. And then he'd come back. He'd be like he was actually paying the bills, what he was doing around the corner. But he told us he was gonna go to the bathroom and take the car and create we had to create a distraction so that way we could just walk out the door when he'd be ready for us and it'll be funny, as if you actually did that I do?
Speaker 3:we were debating it, we were debating you just start flipping tables.
Speaker 1:I don't, we didn't know what to do.
Speaker 2:No, no, no no, I paid the bill.
Speaker 3:We were at friend friendlies I'll never forget. I love friendly dude. We were at friendlies and that was the first time I got a milkshake from friendlies and it blew my little fucking mind when they bring you the extra in the metal container that's the best part, and I'll just leave it in the. I thought it was an. I thought it was an accident. Yeah, it tasted so good out of the metal container. And I thought it was an accident. Yeah, it tasted so good out of the metal container.
Speaker 3:It's like a frosted mug and I'm just like it is. I'm like holy shit. But yeah, that's my grandpa. Rest in peace.
Speaker 2:But yeah, we are running out of time.
Speaker 1:I didn't tell you when your Uncle Adam laughed yeah, it was Justin all day dude. It was justin all day dude he looked just like justin dude. Well, my uncle, yeah, when he laughed and smiled, dude, he did that fucking smile.
Speaker 3:I was like dude that looks like justin dude uh, us brickner men have distinct traits that you really can't, can't unsee. That's just how we are. I've not met his fiancee yet, so she seems really nice.
Speaker 1:She's got a nice place on Riverside Drive. She lives right around the corner. Oh, really, yeah, I was telling him that we bought a house Sarah and I did and I said we're right around the corner over here, dude, and he goes. He wanted to go golf and he said I'd like to play Mohawk. I was, if you want to play with me, but you're more than welcome. I mean, just let me know. And I said, yeah, we live where he goes. You live like probably around Johnny, don't you? I said, yeah, actually, if I look down the alley I can see his house.
Speaker 3:Yeah, yeah, yeah, that's what I did today. I just walked down the alley, yeah, but, with that being said, we are out of time because if I don't end this, I'm gonna run out of time on our fucking uh on our bus route. So, uh, real quick. We appreciate everybody who's been listening all through the years. You know the fucking drill. You know where to find us. If you're here, great. If you're just here for the first time, you just experienced the awesomeness. So, jay, any departing words? Yes, thank you that was words.
Speaker 1:Yes, thank you, that was a awesome party, All right cool. No, just like John said, thank you everybody, we really appreciate it. That's pretty much. It dude honestly.
Speaker 3:I don't really have anything else to say.
Speaker 1:We always love you. My wife's got to work tonight, so no punani. No punani, no pooch.
Speaker 3:I just watched thatoch Pooch.
Speaker 1:I just watched that movie. I know that's why I was like I'll put that in there.
Speaker 3:Yeah, so we appreciate everybody. We'll see you next week, as always. I'm John Brickner, your name is Todd.
Speaker 1:Your name is Todd and I'm Jason Scherger.
Speaker 3:Later guys, later guys. Later guys, Later guys.